As A Child, I Was Killed, I Was Murdered, I Just Didn't Realize I Was Dead

The Grief that I must Mourn,

is a loss already gone.

I see myself,

a stately lie,

without the "Me" inside.

Confused about this sight.

I cry, but cannot shout.

The tears are dry,

my mind still wrought,

I cannot figure out,

all the "Why's" of "Won't."

What have I done so wrong?

To deserve this grave in stone?

Without a Marker for my name,

I lay upon that Basement Slab,

left for.....well, it's sad.

Years upon years I was,

so confused, I fled.

I ran from within myself,

to anyplace but here.

Today I separate!

I state my name,

my birth, this date,

the reason why I died,

and the Year I never cried.

The hidden fears with no release,

I place upon this Stone at Dawn,

so that my Fear of Life may be,

acceptance of the Death I see.

Love Always, 

From Me.

~

THE GRIEF THAT DARE NOT SPEAK ITS NAME

SANDRA L. BLOOM, M.D.

EMAIL FROM AMERICA

When someone close to us dies, society generally accepts and even expects us to undergo a process of mourning. Physical death presents a tangible and comprehensible loss. Traditionally, mourning is not just an individual rite of passage, but a socially conditioned and approved pathway for recovery from loss enabling us to let go of those who have died, and prepare ourselves for new attachments.

Largely unrecognized is the necessity and value of grieving for other kinds of losses besides those associated with actual death. A common denominator for adult survivors of childhood abuse and neglect are less tangible, but nonetheless significant losses of hope, of innocence, of love and of joy. For adult survivors, the losses that accompany child maltreatment, are cloaked in silence, lost in the shrouds of history, and largely unrecognized. But these “little deaths” linger as unremoved splinters in the survivor’s psyche for decades. In general, the expression of grief for these losses is unaccepted, rejected, denied and stigmatized.

The Temple of Set

The pain within my being is what shall free me from this World.

You deny that which is only a bastard Soul,

sold to the Mother for Immortality of Old.

Do as you please and know that I am empty of your pleasure.

You have produced idiocy as your measure,

in this I enjoy only the fact that your denial increases my ability to know.

As you rob me of my children,

you take away what is not yours to secure.

Know that with my Father as Satan Himself,

you shall procure your own end,

for in this thought you shall be without doubt,

'We' All Die Eventually!!

 The purchase of my Soul,

sealed its Fate upon the Skin of a Human Being.

my eldest sister held my Heart because of this action,
a formal deed.

Return to me what is deservedly mine,

and I shall find only your preserved words for our Mothers DEATH wish. 

My eldest sister wishes for our mother to be melted from within,

it is known as spontaneous combustion and looked upon as a sin of what has been.

My eldest sister wishes for our mother a death I cannot, will not, be a part of,
in thought, in action or in sought.

My eldest sister is an abomination to me.

For you wish our Mother to be cursed and yet,

you know nothing of her Countenance.

And for that simple error,

I out your Terror upon her life.

What happened to me,

did not happen to you,

and you are nothing more than the accident that created this chore.

A Shotgun Wedding at best.

My Haunts do not serve your Port,

they torture MINE.

You are reprehensible,

and behind the facts of what is the Truth,

you are Uncouth!

In The Stillness of Ones Mind, You Will Find A Peaceful Resign

Seemingly, the Battle of your Life is found,

when you find that you MUST survive your Circumstances!

Regardless of your age when this War begins,

it is yours to wage.

Eventually, if you are lucky,

you may begin to gain insight into the unfair advantage of your birth.

Your Parental Figures are given a Thirty-Year jump.

Your siblings have a birth-right that predates you,

giving them insight that you would, or could, never obtain,

unless, 

they speak of the Ill's they may have been subjected to also.

Once you begin to level this playing field which we have been delivered upon,

you may find that you are no longer interested in wanting to engage with the idiots

you know, the ones that had had such an unfair advantage in your life. 

Almost as if,

if they have not spoken up by now,

who is really interested in their opinion anymore?

Obviously they were in agreement with the abuse or as the abused,

they too would have fought back,

just for sake.

With some kind of regularity or assumption on the part of these abusive people,

albeit, they are all still older than you,

they just can't keep themselves from this one thing.

Showing the pride that they have in getting away with their abuse in your life.

Almost as if these Family Members believe that there will never be a day

that you could stand independently of them and with a bold voice,

tell of the horrors perpetrated upon your life since birth by them, 

your own Flesh and Blood, supposedly.

It seems that there is a fleeting belief that Society will take pity,

now that they are in there Golden Years, 

how could you convict them of any Crime,

let alone crimes that I was told in my youth by my Step-Father,

"The Statute of Limitations will have run out by the time you get the balls to speak."

Therefore, as he put it,

"We will never suffer the punishment for our misdeeds to you or anyone else."

I guess that in a rather sick and perverted manner,

he was correct,

but really, the reality is much more perverse.

I survived what had happened,

I Continue!!

 However,

 those that fostered this abuse must live with the condemnation and thereupon the judgments,

 of their actions in Eternity.

A Statute with no Limit to Time Itself.

I saw this in a dream.....I was in the Halls of ....

The gates of Valhalla have broken the locks of time before time was....

I would like to know the Compassion not yet known.  The Visions of the Past that lead us into an understanding of the future, not a confusion of timeless measure.  The bounds of our loss cannot be calculated by our minds. It just seems to be forcing an equation for the void between life and death so that it can not be understood, just feared.

The gift from the creator of such beautiful minds, said to be in favor with his own, should only compliment his prayer for glory in the journey between the conscience and unconscious.  Instead it seems blurred by the doubt in your mind and you are blinded by the delusion or the story of only a golden mansion in the sky to be had upon your entry to the Deathly Realms. All while your soul or spiritual self does nothing to repent for your existence in this world or prepare for your entry into a different one.

To look into the Hour Glass of Time, realizing that the probability of a space before Time, was merely the place when Souls were divided and Twin Flames created to experience this journey independently and yet with only one hope to bring solace to such a decision.  The Twin Souls would join to ascend as one in the end so they may be in The Continue and not subject to your End of Times scenario.  This thought would have only been carried through to ensure our survival if the visual of such impending disaster had been  concreted with the evidence that seems to be in existence today.  Albeit a Seer or a Sage would have had to have spoken and thereupon been believed readily.  For the dilemma would have been forthcoming and judging by the lack of belief in difference or the thought that "A progressive thought is an atheist thought today," the decision would have had to have been made quickly, without Fear and with the Conviction that it was the correct thing to do.

We are not by chance, nor are we beings that are not capable of what may end up being something incredible.  What we know here as life, is an opportunity to see the ones that provide you with choice and accept duty to a higher purpose so that you may experience further growth in any life that you may be fortunate enough to have experienced or to know that you may experience. This is an opportunity to be free of such narrow thinking on man’s part that only encourages disbelief and fear of the unknown.

To take pause in this life, to imagine a divide, an inclusion, a movement of grace and beauty on behalf of the appreciation of the creator of mankind, be it evolution, god, big bangs or any other countless reasons that flow into our libraries to explain the beginning of our existence should be our interest, not cause divisions in our thinking.  To halt your thoughts and engage your source of hidden reveal for your own person is what I ask you to require as engagement in this matter of your minds.  This world has filled the end times with prejudice of presumption to know and announce not only dates but the very means of the disciplines of the destruction that shall reign upon us.  How can such simple minds presume to know what graces us with the visions of an end?  A known to a secret reveal would be an answer to the question of the Keep, and not whom the Keep belongs.  The Keeper of such Ancient and Timeless minds would only increase a desire to acquire the Keep for the wealth of Souls and the Spirituality that that might deliver if sought out.  The beauty  in the continuance towards the transcendence of life itself should be a moment with Spiritual understanding, not Fear and Strife.

To have so much, to know so little, and to propagate so much negativity and doubt about life itself, is in truth, shameful for all of humanity.

James Blunt, my Darkest Lord, you have stolen me from the start; I swoon to Knight!

 I wrote this last year, but I feel like I should post it again today.
 I need a bit of levity and he provides me with that.   I hope you enjoy reading what I so enjoyed writing.

~

I growl to know the taste,

although, I halt to "No" the vow,

a show, a sin, I swoon for the zoom of lightning strikes to know!

From the depths of where I cannot stand,

I fall to see you are know Man.

I'm damned. Betwixt I am.

My being has been touched,

in imaginative thought,

 I rut, I furrow for a sexual plural.

I am struck by a sense of morality or is it mortality?

Each time I think on this Man,

a man that sings in the verse of a picture,

I hear and whoa! I halt myself to "No."

"Stop!", I say, I do cry,

not in tears, in loudness of, "Oh My!".

He complicates me with deviousness and sensuality,

I sigh to know from far below.

Feel between... the lie,

to know the desire comes from deep inside.

Moving in on such a sin,

I say, "Knot Too."

For in this simple, I complicate you, true?

Seduction demands a Man to press upon,

to work towards a Heavenly Degree,

but it is the Devil in me which grounds the Man I see!!

To be more thought and never bought,

to see a design towards what is hot,

you will be burnt into my mind,

the state you are, the very same kind.

I shall be the One of few who says to you,

"Yes Sir, No Sir, Three bags full Sir."

Surreal is the deal,

 you strike when you wheel,

 the mind of another and it is not hard, it's real.

I mine so deep,

it hardens, from thought to desire, I leap.

Incomplete.

Not for me 'cause,

I trade up for simple sexual desire.

In a place that is not welcoming,

you must come to know release.

From Me? Know.

So, sweetly do I say,

"Oh Lord, dear Man, I watched your show, your band."

And in the end, Mr. James Blunt you are,

with such excitement, un-repressed and un-scarred,

on stage or in a car,

it is the Denims, it is the boots, the t-shirts are mean,

but you are the loot and you do declare,

"I'll be your Man!"

In excellence, I accept,

in greed of what I am lusting after.

I congratulate myself in sin and press towards you,

what you do, to declare War on Sensuality too!

As you stand, My Piano Man.

Arms outstretched is your plan,

acceptance of, is my command.

At the end of what you've done,

I will not wake, nor will I run!

I ride the Wave of what you've made,

my mind is complimenting in equal time

of what is so fine.

You on Stage.

I dream in reality and live in liberty,

to excite myself without delight,

but to achieve such heights,

I do; Just by what I like.

You dear Sir,

would be so tight,

I just might,

but prowess in such a Knight.

Mistakes the days for points of view,

instead of times to look for you.

I drink it in and gladly sin,

to know that to the avail of myself I am true.

Happily for you.

Raise the board,

for wanting more,

will come from "My Lord."

Deep from far, far from Me,

I fall back, I swoon for thee.

Reality catches myself in tune,

to finish what never starts,

with Concerts in the Park

that you delivered from the heart.

Appeasing, don't you think,

My dear Bluntie,

please blink.

 Never forget to be

who you are or what you chose,

for you will always have me.

Set Zero,

I never lose.

~

Dear Mom,

In the beginning, or should I say, when I was younger than today, I believed that you would not test Fate.  I believed the Heavens above would remind you of your Creator and somehow this would warm your Heart.  Who or what you believe to be your Creator is not for me to judge, it is personal and should be kept with you, as your belief, be discreet not assuming.

I wanted to believe that you were capable of choosing left from right.  I wanted to believe that all roads would lead to Spiritual knowledge.  I understand now that I was wrong.  All Roads do have destination points, but you must chose those destinations yourself and you must do this standing independent of what other people may think or ram down your throat.  Each of us are capable of truly understanding the Freedom of Choice and thereupon able to accept every action will have an equal and more than likely an opposite reaction.

I wondered as I was growing-up, and as I watched you go about living your life how you could be so indifferent to the Welfare of other Human Beings.  I would watch, I would listen and as a result, I did learn that the differences between you and I were as much the same as they were also vastly different.  I did not believe in destroying or taking Human Life for granted, as I know from personal experience that you do.  The first and only lesson I recall you ever showed to me.  I could not understand how you could be so Blind and so Deaf towards Human Beings in so much need.  These Men and Women surrounded you each and everyday and it seemed that they were as receptive to the abuse as you were to deliver it to them.  Than I began to realize something, it was not your lack of Sight into this tragedy or the fact that you were unable to Hear or Listen to the fact that they were knowingly allowing this strange abuse.  I realized that you put on these Glasses to be able to see through the needs of all of these people, regardless of if those needs had good or bad intentions, you, just like them, just did what you wanted to do because you can.

I accept you as you are but you may find that the problem lies in this simple thought, "I don't believe, that you have ever accepted yourself that way."  You may find peace of mind should you try accepting yourself, as yourself and then maybe you could find forgiveness for yourself.

Dr. Vuksinick told me last year that you had written the Script for my Life.  I laughed, he smiled, and, I said, "I know, but thanks for telling me, it means so much that somebody like you knows that too." I went on to say, "I believe that it has finally run out of pages, I seem to not have anymore lines to read."  He gave me that loving look of acceptance and gave me a big hug.

Thank you, Mom, for taking me to see this incredible Psychiatrist at Three Years Old.  I was so lucky to have been understood by such a wonderful Man so early in my Life, it set the tone for who I truly have become and always will be. I was even more fortunate as an adult, when for reasons of your own, you walked me back into his office. I don't know why you did this to me, I have to say that it was for the sake of cruelty itself, but thank you because it had that opposite affect I spoke of earlier. The fact he recognized me and knew me so personally, gave such credence to my life, but in truth it was his words that were filled with such wisdom that gave me the desire to continue the Fight for that same Life.  As he put it more eloquently than I, "You are worth it, fight for it."  So much more ended-up being shared between us, however I wish to keep it just between he and I, it makes me feel so good that we were able to speak again and he made me feel something I had not felt in years, loved.

This letter that I write to you, Mother, is in Respect and in the Honor of Dr. Vuksinick and what he did for my Life, however through giving me the most amazing gift of strength in-spite of such horrid circumstances, I am able to make this appeal for your life, in hopes you will be able to forgive yourself for what you have done to so many people without thought or consideration for anyone but yourself.

Vuksinick died last month and I miss him.



LOUIS VUKSINICK
Death Notice

Louis M. Vuksinick
A gifted and beloved psychiatrist and Jungian analyst, Louis Martin Vuksinick, M.D. (Lou) died nobly as he had lived, on Wednesday, October 17, 2012 at home after challenging leukemia and neck cancer for four years. During this time he continued to practice in San Francisco and in Palo Alto where he lived. He is survived by his wife of 30 years, Janet Robinson, the love of his life; four stepchildren; Gregory, Timothy, Anne and Jeffrey Petersen and their partners and seven grandsons; and his sister Maxine Russell of Salt lake City. Born in Spring Glen, Utah, February 27,1934 to Louis L. Vuksinick and Zelpha Skriner, he attended medical school at the University of Utah. Coming to San Francisco in 1959 for his internship at St. Mary's Hospital, he went on to complete his psychiatric residency at Stanford University Medical School 1960-63 and Analytic Training at the C. G. Jung Institute of San Francisco 1974-88. He held leadership and teaching roles in the Department of Psychiatry, McAuley Neurospsychiatric Institute, St. Mary's Hospital 1969-1980. He is noted for his work about the body-psyche connection, and his love of music, especially opera. He will be greatly missed. A Memorial Mass will be held in San Francisco at St. Ignatius Church, 650 Parker Av, Saturday, Nov. 3 at 10 AM. Memorial contributions may be made to the C. G. Jung Institute of San Francisco in his honor.

 R.I.P.

Everything Starts Somewhere!! Bucket Requests

KAREN A. PLACEK

SACRAMENTO, CA 95838

March 18, 2006

March 18, 2006

Hello, my name is Karen; my mother is Melba M. Meakin the owner of Tal-y-Tara Tea and Polo Shoppe in San Francisco, formerly known independently as Waters Upton Tea Room and Tal-y-Tara Tack & Tweed. Hugh and Melba Meakin ran Student League of San Francisco and also founded the James S. Brady Therapeutic Riding Program, Horses in California, Inc., Golden Gate Park Polo Club, San Francisco Polo in the Park, Jumping in the Park and Dressage in the Park Show Series.  She also founded Christ Bearers Choral Congregation in San Francisco, currently known as Christ Bearers Bible Church.  My mother has always been the evangelical leader of the Christ Bearers Church.  All of these organizations are put forth as "nonprofits" and are still in effect currently in operation, with the exception of Tal-y-Tara, which is the only profit-seeking business that they own.

As Melba's third child from her first marriage, I have been privy to many different events and inner workings of my mother's organizations over the past 35 to 40 years.  I was born in 1965 in San Francisco to Edward and Melba Placek, parents of my two older siblings.  Melba divorced in the late 1960's, early 1070's, after a falling out about the Church that they had begun together with many others.  Melba then married Hugh Meakin after a lurid affair, which ended up being the nail in the coffin for her previous marriage.  Hugh and Melba Meakin continued on with the Church and had two more children.  Melba now had Five Children, with an age range of 18 years between the Oldest and the Youngest.  She currently has Seven Grandchildren it total.

I left my mother's home at the the age of 18 and ex-communicated myself from their Church.  I did not speak or have any contact with my mother and step-father or Church Members for approximately Five Years.  I had made a choice to never speak of my Family's Business  Affairs, in part because of the strict upbringing, which included "don't ask, don't tell" mentality.

Over the years I have tried to reconnect with my Family and have had conversations with my Mother and my Step-Father specifically asking them to put the past behind us and enjoy all the future has to offer.  I have never been successful in my endeavor to do so.  I have had to bear witness instead to the flagrant actions of my own mother and step-father showing no accountability of remorse for their actions, for the lives that have been lost.  Rather I have had to watch them openly gloat about the events leading up to this time in their lives, even going so far as to suggest or even state that they have not received enough financial gain for their perceived sacrifices.  At the same time they have continued to manipulate the truth in an effort to engage me, in order to see what I actually remembered.  I had to ask myself this question, when is enough, really enough?  I answered that question very quickly and just recently, when she shifted her manipulative manners and attentions onto my children for revenge against my defiant manner.  Her blatant disregard for the feelings and emotional well-being of my Four Children made answering this Question instant and without doubts.  This Time is Now, enough is finally, enough.  My shoulders are not big enough to continue to carry the burden of all the knowledge in regards to my mother's choices and actions and dealings with Jim Jones.  The accountability and responsibility lies on the shoulders and in the laps of Hugh and Melba Meakin and the off-spring that support this Con.  The knowledge of such crimes against Humanity have become in essence unbearable.

Melba and Hugh Meakins sudden independent wealth and perceived Station in Life is, highly suspect and should lead any good citizen to question the Origin of such an Estate.  It does have one.  The actions and decisions made over this 40 Year long Con has made this Lifestyle possible.  Their simple presence and ownership of Real Estate in San Francisco, including their home, estimated at quite a worth, raises questions as to whom has afforded this life.  "Where did their Wealth come from?"  I know. "Who paid for all of what you see and now no longer exists because it has been sold by Melba and Hugh Meakin, specifically."  I know.  Neither Hugh, nor Melba Meakin has maintained or been employed proving a legitimate career that would or could even come close to supporting this rather lavish lifestyle which they have enjoyed for so many years.

With the support of my Children, I have chosen to write a book with my Mother portrayed just as she is. This book will be an accurate account of my life while spending all of my young life at my mother side, as it has been proven I am the product of an affair.  In the end, I believe that this will free me from the haunting memories that have plagued me each and every day of my existence.  I have faith and I believe that by exposing this Con as the lie that it is, I may have an opportunity, albeit slim, to bring validity to the lives of many people, both dead and alive.  I hope that in time that people that suffered these horrors will choose to step forward and tell their own personal story.

I am reaching out to friends and acquaintances alike that may have known my Mother through these tumultuous years in hopes that you may be capable of filling in the missing chapters before my birth to this Earth.  I would really appreciate it if you would write down your memories to help me write a truthful and accurate narrative to this atrocity.  I respect your anonymity and you may remain anonymous if you wish, I will respect your confidence.

Thank you for your time and input.

Sincerely,

Karen A. Placek

*This is the letter that I had originally written that caused my family to attack me once again.  I had hoped that it was going to hold them at bay, but rather it seemed to have had the opposite affect.

Why Are People Sold On Revelations and an Apocolyse As Our Only Option? We Are in The Continue, Not The End of Times

I See ourselves in the Depth of Times.

Each person grasping for any understanding stating,

"This is not the end!"

I say, "It is The Continue!!"

Yet, so many wish for only an Apocalypse.

Almost as if the Christian would rather have this horrid destructive means to an end,

than be wrong and have it turn out to be,

A Begin.

An absence in this belief,

a declaration that Traditions are wrong,

do not seem to be voiced very often throughout Time.

Instead of holding on to a fragment of Hope,

an idea of difference,

Christians beat you down with words that claim you are an Anti-Christ.

Stupidity rings between their ears,

should they think that a Man,

will return to be damned by the Human Race yet again.

Why not look for change that doesn't include a persons Crucifiction to establish a Faith.

Christians would rather blow us all to Hell,

than to even entertain this fact.

Be aware of the Fundamentalist,

they are in truth only here to advantage themselves.

They are not frightened of Hell,

because they deliver it to you everyday through their Ministry.

Our lives show us The Ages.

In the bloom of our existence,

we witness our ability to grow.

To be accountable and to be given the opportunity to do so,

is a gift to each and every Human Being today.

Instead of turning away or exposing that Deaf Ear to pain,

be wise and know that in this thought you will feel a gain,

not a loss.

There is more than just ourselves to understand,

we must accept what has happened to make society at such odds.

As such a junction,

when all you see is hurt,

I am grateful for my worth.

To know, to be confident that we Continue,

brings solace into my very Being.

I must confess,

my trip to this place has not been worth the trouble it has taken to survive it.

To be exposed to so much negativity, to experience so much abuse and manipulation,

 to be raped, in body, in mind and in soul,

I can say that I am truly sorry for whom I have known throughout my life,

I pity who you must be and certainly who you will and have become,

ignoramuses at best.

In hindsight, I wish I had been chosen for a different Universal Journey.

As there is no faith in such a thought, I speak frankly because nobody cares anyway.

However, this has been a path that has been chosen for me,

I must respect the powers that are greater than myself, 

they are more knowing and I believe that they do know best,

when it comes to this type of decision about ones life.

For that reason,

I must then Teach myself as I go,

for I have not had a whole lot of instructions given to me from this World,

unless you count how to destroy other people.

Faith in the next World has guided me and protects me from further harm,

I must believe that something has looked out for me,

I simply am not that good to have been able to survive this nightmare alone.

I appreciate that the choices that have been made for me in my life are for the betterment of yours.

Because my life has been shattered by the actions of so many,

that all I can do is to stand and trust that there must be a message of some sort in it that I need to convey.

I cannot believe this has all been for naught.

But, so be it, 

if that proves to be true!!

Good Luck, 'cause Life is Tough

My Abuse Began At Birth And It Seems That Because It Is My Family That Has Perpetrated These Crimes, My Choice Is, I don't get one

P.T.S.D. is a serious after-effect of trauma.  Should people care more then maybe people can begin to realize that the only way to recover from severe abuse is to speak about it until you don't have to anymore. And it actually takes years for us to speak about the real issue that is haunting our minds, especially if it happened when we were very young and then never stopped, ultimately making us break all connections with our family as adults.  This means that the abuse has never met an end in our lives because we cannot stop our Families from torturing us.  Almost as if there is no way out!!  An extremely daunting situation to be faced with alone.

The sad thing is that most of us that have suffered such unspeakable horrors that it takes a long time to even be able to confront ourselves about what has happened within our own family, let alone speak out loud about what actually happened. Rape is rape at any age, Incest is incest and until you can realize that with incest within your family, you are really screwed not just literally because there is no place to turn for help, it is a Family affair and a family agreement. By the time we get to the point where we can, or at least think we can tell our story, we are told "I can't hear what you are saying because you have said it already and it upsets me and I can't have that in my life."

 If it upsets a person who was never even been subject to this type of abuse, what do you think that it has done to those of us that survived it?  On top of the fact that most of us did try as children to speak or to get help and I know at least in my case I was beaten and subsequently never tried to speak again and I did not speak until I began and spoke about it on my Google Blog.  So I cannot begin to express how grateful I am to Google for providing a Blogging Environment without judgement or editing so that I am able to tell  my story without discouraging me as I go. But the best part about my Google Blog is "You" don't have to read it, and that way you can continue to live in the perfect world you most obviously must exist in.

 In addition, I would like to say to all of the people that say they cannot listen to these type of stories, I would like you to know that I receive emails from strangers that have been so badly hurt, much like myself saying thank for putting into words what happened to them and that they never thought they would be able to read or have what happened to them put into words so they could read it and know it was real.

 I guess in the end you are fortunate if you haven't been hurt badly in life, but sadly, many people have been hurt and all we try to do for our entire lives is get brave enough to do something about it. All while we are shot down for our effort to become brave enough to tell our story. I believe or I have found out for myself that people who will not listen and are only interested in the "Gossip" of this madness, are and have become as damaging to us as the people who perpetrated the crime originally.

So it turns out that when you are a kid and you are raped and beaten, nobody believes you and you are locked in your room. When you are finally an adult and can bear witness to this abuse, you are told that you are unable to remember correctly and you were to young to know if it happened or not, or, you are told that the statute of limitations has run out.

 A personal note for all you doubters, you never forget being FUCKed between your legs, especially as grown men drive their penis into a place that makes you SCREAM in pain. Or, as your brother and sister sell you out to their friends and they do the same and worse, because they just stood over the top of me and squirted their Cum all over my face and my body.  I really don't think you can forget, as much as you would like to, it is the nightmares of being dragged out of bed again in the middle of the night that recaptures the reality of this fight.  Not just a stupid memory if you can still feel his shaft shoved up inside of you and the Cum drowning you.

Do You Want To Build A Planet Today?

What's up with you?

Want to build a planet or two?

I heard you were killing yours,

Is that true?

Why did you do that to your Home?

Forgive me,

I don't want to be rude.

Building with you,

Building with me,

Building with everyone,

Come on

Build a planet today.

Tomorrow will be to late!

I'm sorry for your loss.

Want to come with me?

'Cause there is not much left,

can you see what I see?

The other kids do!!

Building with you,

Building with me,

Building with everyone,

Would you like to learn how to build a planet today?

Can you hear me down there?

Do you have ears?

Are they gone to?

There will be nothing left if you don't change.

Building with you,

Building with me,

Building with everyone,

would be the best!

Please come and build a planet today.

Turn away?

Seems you have a blind eye to all of this anyway.

Chose quickly though,

or the choice will be made for you.

Come on,

Build a planet today,

Tomorrow will be to late!!

It All Starts With .........

Nobody cares unless you do.

I have watched my whole life through,

for anyone that has stood this insanity too.

Most become involved in the Filth,

by learning how to Manipulate to Steal your Wealth.

This seems to be common fare.

I wonder?

Have you been advantaged there?

Just like then,

accept Today.

Nobody listens while you say,

"Things like this don't go away, they just get worse and even more perverse."

I know what they do when that front door shuts behind all of you.

 My Family mounted no disguise behind your back to exploit your lives.

Beating you down until they convince You,

that You are nothing,

 then they advance.

You, change your Will's, to show,

Them as the Sole Inheritor, then they go,

 further yet to get what's best,

your signature albeit duress.

You do sign and seal your fate,

 upon those paper's that Lawyers hate.

Then you're pushed right out the door,

just before the ink runs more......

a sight I grew to just abhor,

and yet you returned for more.

One friend jumped from the Golden Gate bridge.

Another hanged himself,

he just couldn't live.

All because of what my family did.

Cashing in upon your strife,

this is the blade that cut your life.

 Breaking your Heart,

 voiding your Soul,

leaves you with an enormous hole.

I guess it's true that no one cares,

 'cause in the end they take from you,

 the only thing that can't be proved......

your life.

"Look Who's Talking!!"

The Chill In The Verse Of A Streaming Sage

Sizing You up to decide your worth,

You are eyed for all things Perverse.

The Monsters that You state are Clean,

I say, " The Christian Religion is really mean."

needing a Fall Guy for everything.

Looking at You to be the next source of  their Narcissistic Energy,

that drives the very next Question to be the Answer You need.

The debate I have witnessed as they read,

making you wish you had their Personalities. 

As this dance that turns to offer You the chance,

You never leave this Lurid Romance because You don't believe that this is an advance,

upon Your very living being,

to take Your Soul and all Your things.

You might believe this horror rehearsed.

Have Faith in what gives this thought:

It's worse.

Not only do these Monsters dress,

but they also often put to the test,

upon the offspring that does protest.

I only stand witness 'cause I'm not deaf.

My Life they did so often project,

these deeds of wretched abuse, a debt,

as I watched and You did witness,

turned your heads to leave instead,

I have come to believe that inside, You're dead.

A Question I Ask albeit "Of past,"

Who didn't get a piece of my ass?

It seems that my family, these Monsters You need,

are not shocked by these words that I express.

It makes me know that it's not Who Knew?,

but rather to come to believe, Who didn't?.

For I was the Daughter of Satan's birth,

made to bear a long and lasting curse.

The receptacle for all that is perverse,

this is what my life has nursed.

But in the end I'll do what's best,

I'll tell the truth and put that to test,

to be what You were not for me,

honest about this tragedy.

A Craigslist Post, Advertising Exorcisms In The Bay Area

Actual Advertisement on:
Craigslist Link ~ http://sfbay.craigslist.org/sby/grp/3322932023.html

Deliverance Exorcism San Francisco Bay Area

http://deliveranceministryusa.blogspot.com

 church,churches

You really have to read it to believe it.

________________________________________________________________________

My thoughts on the subject.

Just when you think that you will never see this type of Abuse again, there it is in Black & White and plain as day.  The actual site is an insight into the insanity that Christianity breeds amongst it's own.  In reality it is really sad to think about how many of these I personally lived through growing up in a home where they also believed in taking these type of actions and worse.  People lose their lives during this type of abuse, sadly I witnessed that too.  And nobody did anything about it.  I have lived with this nightmare for as long as I can remember, I bear witness to what has happened behind the closed doors of a home, that I was born and raised in where the readily performed Exorcisms with many Congregation Members helping to pin the person down. It is not a joke when this is done in front you or to you. Maybe one day soon, people will realize that for themselves, before this gets worse and more out of control than it already is today.