The hatred runs deep within,
you're born, you're worn, you simply try.
Years go by you're all alone,
no matter how hard you work, The Why?
I close my eyes, my third eye out.
Why bother you to even shout.
If I don't have what it's about,
you don't listen or even tout.
The rage that settles inside of me,
a view of something you will need.
I'm the blame child, gifted see.
Daughter of the malignancy.
What I know is family,
tortured so for normalcy.
If they came out it would show,
God would tell them, "Please, don't go".
Sex was always, the topic stayed.
All night long they would rage.
Where I learned from no age,
birth is for the men of sage.
Obviously it's not for her.
My half-sister is blood and more,
screaming across the dinning room.
She proclaimed, there is no broom.
Blow your head off, she declared,
almost louder than she shared.
Best for our family, you're a spare.
Use a gun, close to heir.
Searching words caused me despair.
She is fourth in sibling count.
Second husband, no recount.
Told some people about her fount,
no one believes you 'till your Dead.
Funny how you try and try,
just to be with any guy.
To feel safer from this, FRY!
Do they ever quit or sigh.
Thinking maybe do or die,
isn't such a cool re-try.
All my family speaks of is,
years and years of earnings, live!
Should you know them when you're down,
Wills and Trust Funds will abound.
Cruising, Limo's, shopping sprees,
you will pay for on your knees.
Tote they will of power plays,
till the guilt is worn that way.
Take it all or take it Sum.
Does it matter, you're now dumb.
Lost within this maze of life,
bet you wish you had a knife.
Declare your income,
declare your shade,
even songs give way.
No encouragement, no simple grave,
just run like hell and no your save.
Should your family see your plight,
will they know that you're alright?
Can't tell a story 'bout Death and Fight.
All will think it's time; Don't bite!
Take some drugs for yourself,
you're depressed and into delve!
Accusations fly about,
you need a shrink
or locked account.
They shine so bright while you fight.
Your family says, "they must be right".
There goes your fortune,
your bank account,
your savings and your last genuine mount.
Lost your Horses? while polo's played.
Use a mallet not a blade.
Back in an ancient world view,
balls were skulls and worked for few.
Testimony of this sank,
behind the vault and biggest rank.
Highest Officer I would call,
would be guy and he would fall.
Death is what he sings about,
just a random guy to count.
Liked his verse, it matched my curse,
No, I will not take my life.
Why would I they would pout!
Never worry 'bout such things,
'cause it's taken far beneath,
when my mom sold soul for soul,
signed in blood, red, parchment fold.
I wasn't more than two years old.
Don't mean to bother, don't mean to stain,
someone that I call by name.
It's just the common thread we hold,
Death or Dead we're not so old.
Love the songs that echo in.
Keep me free and knowing sin.
Turn up the dial for a while,
maybe he will know this child.
Kinder, surely pictures show,
exampling the way that I should go.
But, I'm held tight and all alone,
fighting family and not a tone.
Bet he gets his hearts desire,
every time that he retires.
Go my friend in sleepless sway,
watch out and never come this way.
My sisters pledge for every man,
hoarding thoughts of discipline.
I gave up years ago,
every time I said "Don't go".
Trickery in my hands held,
impossible partner that I can't hold.
They can't take, what I can't have,
try and try they got so bold.
No response, thank god for; Ignore!
They're just crazy and I was board.
Sorry you were shored.
Never thought it would go so far,
you protect me in my car.
My radio plays me, but I scar,
cuts and bruises, flashbacks, Hard!
I keep my chin up, I won't char.
Karen A. Placek
4/25/2011
