At Least I Won't Cry Myself To Death 'Cause I'll Know I Twas Not Smokin' I Was On Fired

The Aim of Hall was too All so dine on the Double dee in the bit Itself as alive,

as the table set Thanksgiving the Turkey Twas NOT I rather the House of Ill respit,

that is the Muslim on the Wish for My Life in the Singular Match Stick Book sold at 7-11,

now these Book owe Matches are GIVEN Free of Charge with the Box Bucketed Cigs.

To Top that Hatter is the Muslim Indian on the Jihad of MY LIFE to that Payphone buy design,

as Acid in the Hand to Touch Tell the fee is In the Rubin of this Obvious on tell,

speed that drive to this Caustic foul And What do You have but the United States on Sell!!

Given as the Sacrifice of Tom Cruises'Sexual cause The US has delivered Free Rein to Hollywoods lie,

in that Instant Photo Can It hath BEEN AGREED that TOM CRUISE is the Won & Blunt the Incinerators Bide,

no Worries for From to Send As I All WAYs accept the Muslim Career in knowing I've Burned Alive before By The Muslim Crusades specifically,

towards Every American I cart the Harness before the Hoarse.

To period that Presently spanned I credit James Blunt for the Patience to Allow the US such a diabolical Calling,

as that Must be of A difficult Come.

Par Ma Chawn Cheese

Being designed to task at heart the Mines on the spine that have to Camped,

in the store of the structured the Trains and the Gold is the mineral a Vapor!!

Person Place Proper Prime divide the Math and enter Summed that down of feather Driscoll,

as the situation On the field is the Working slaving Signed in the House of worlds sad,

to fruit of Straw the berried lined to bake the Caste and battery Sunned.

The enclosure of the Seed to sync is that bite of Sugars sweet in the depth of Mind,

should the connect Inter brett than is that I land lens in lung,

does the Tunnel of the Vice bread to make the hards on brake or does Society steal!!

To dance the Fires on the Shine in the Trout the feed is Censored to that Ore of ground,

Miners in the Temple Pass still do Coal on dressing less the Walk of you Are warm,

PGE to Bell Telephone how does the Smog go Dinner tend while the Cell is copper`d!!

Now at that Notice to this Prose in that Net of catch this Prose a shoulder to the Car,

living is a difficult to Advertised with good tough luck Which is the circus Clupe!!,

shell beach Clams beseech to Muscle on the I owe dine to baked Potato and the Time,

is that dial on the Moons of the Hin dues to this brine as the See salts Sweater!!

Round the Clepe to gather gent is that laughter that populize Consider Mastered at the Steer,

is it an Ink lean to the Cusp of the Prize that stands to state or is it begging Questions,

in basic Basque to table Form nap kin on that Ole lee An dure to tea a Coffee cupped,

tease with the bull of Bagged and be sure to smug that Knows up sigh for in the Item pick It!!

Fenced to storm the Venue corn as what is What win back to luck,

wink Mi that signal and Press to truth for in the broadcasting its a Tues,

but thats Okay thats All right left to cheer the bracket duck & be Clever sur to Goosed,

for that Just burn at AA meetings Call the phone and gross the score to sale,

barter benched to Start a cinch and don't for get to burrow Rumped!!

Tacking trailers hitch to Sump in this brought with Salinas loud a Nugget prouds your Flush,

angus beef to butter drunk the milk and honey of be a Trump,

card that All sew Taro cars Gas Oh lean to Storage dust,

because Why's the Pour its Not your Wais in Means of present Licked,

however in the brain that paved check Cab do the process in Joy ace bagged.

Dick Widgers` Minuet From The Loc ~ It's A Bell Throw Clang

The Wee Saul of the gee is on the times of divide ask the met to that handicap On Horse,

as the vile barked the Treed to fox Whole on the brews Taught^See gained.

Creative design with read Moved to gather a Collection on the bits of priced to groove,

to touch the after Class the quest of shunned is orb to steam the strake,

pronunciation of the lane would be the jest as in for Inch on that scoot is a toy lets level!!

Professional Wood at the Park and the Stay gallants a Win pane as the Door of a dine,

a chair on the Wickle to brake as the paint The Show is of Organ & The Duet knows!!

Treat the Winnie the Pooh to a date Once a Year,

the Oat on the sign as the Cat makes it Score,

this is the plank that Sausalito grace,

truth be that Trader to the Joe on a Day.

Original to Tenderloin or Close Enough to Grew,

that Fun and the Playland slides on the Burlap to stop the Burns of chew`d,

garden on the Plum Tree that concrete of the Sides,

trucks that Root Beer cost to the S.P.C.A. on the Hour.

Arguello Pet Hospital Rossi on the Pool,

lathe the Hot Chocolate to Diving on the Tube,

river Bends with drives of learn that Crows must Fly too,

trainers on the Runners gamed to Make the Hearth a Rhyme.

Now base the gorge to School of stunned as the Phone did sing,

a live on the oust was the bling friend stair,

on Bed knobs and Broom stick these are the Eden brae`s,

that fiddle Faddle on the Crock did the velvet climb!!

The beach of Sport to Stealth the Yard as the Hose was Bathtubs grub,

that lawn to Water the Cycle would be Golden Gate on stood,

the Stables tasked the Paddocks law and Stallions that did deeds,

for on the Jewel E ard the left was Age a Boo`d.

Still on stern the Heidi made for Misty saddled Foaled,

to toil on San Door owes Spring marched More's to Colt the Stored,

at Two Years age the Separate was Goods to go a Paid,

yet on that Atlas of the Mapped the Dressage grained its Sour.

Dough be Bred to games of Courts the Kentucky Derby Parked,

for Duttie said in Oh how fed that Loft is Hay be dead,

than on the Turns of elbow burns that Hands to Sixteen Won,

boe the Air owed to branches log and that makes Telephone a scanned.

Fax Machines the printables this is no Theses for the sad,

question snot of the legged and Spur it all to Cara,

that Connemara sold to dig the Whole of shades in Angles,

that burnt Fell the P.O.A. which Freckles lake is Stood.

Polo Mal let treat the strain to I ons of the East,

that In Door to that Tom Thumb Carriage those Brads and fits of Tablets,

the Key piano of the Harp enjoyed Repeat repeaters,

yet to the Wise with special Warn the Canal still ran the shagged,

sew this Thread to Silks and Diapers for All do Know the Names,

of Cats that had there Head bonked hard On accident of spare.

Three in Sup`t thrice on Board deeper deeper Seat,

jump No scan Dull to today from Mead dee Uh pro Fained,

is the glue to Super cost that prized does empty with the goo,

or does the planets pull of earth realize that Dirt makes Mud and Apples blue!!

*The MANUAL of HORSEMANSHIP of THE BRITISH HORSE SOCIETY and THE PONY CLUB

EQUITATION

THIRD STAGE

The rider

     It is impossible to lay down any hard or fast rule for training a horse and this is only meant as a guide.  some horses take much longer than others, so it is impossible to give an specific time.  But if the work so far has been correct, the horse should by now be permanently "on the bit", which means he is holding it lightly in his mouth, with a relaxed jaw and obeying the aids without resistance.  Naturally there will always be moments when the horse puts up an evasion and resists the bit, but he should respond immediately to a correction given.  If he does not obey, and if there is no obvious reason, like excitement caused by another horse, a car going down the road, or a bird suddenly flying up, then the rider must ask himself why, and what has been wrong with his training.  It may be that he uses too much hand and not enough leg.  It may be that his stiff himself, which will communicate itself at once to the horse, with dire results.  Or it may be that he has not been clear enough with his aids.

     It is very important for the rider to analyse himself and to be sure he is sitting correctly.  If hes getting too far forward, he will not be in a position to give correct aids.  If he is sitting in the shape of a bow, it would be impossible for him to use his back to push the horse forward.  If he loses his temper he will never get anywhere.  So, if things go wrong, the rider must not blame the horse but himself, and correct his position if necessary.

     Every day the rider must go over all these exercises we have discussed.  As time goes on, he must ask for a better and better performance, aiming always towards perfection.  He must be more strict with the not-so-good movements.  If the rider is satisfied with the progress his horse has made, he may now take his training on a further step by teaching him to counter-canter.

MANUAL OF HORSEMANSHIP

The counter-canter

     This is also an excellent suppling exercise, but it must not be attempted too early as, until the horse is fairly supple he cannot perform it correctly and he will start changing legs behind, which is a very difficult habit to cure.

     First try rather long and not very deep serpentines at the canter.  For instance, canter in a school or alongside a fence on the right leg;  then bring the horse off the track and return to the track without changing legs.  The rider must remember to keep the horse bent to the right, even when going to the left, as it is important for him to keep the bend towards the leading leg.  As the horse gets more and more supple, these serpentines can get deeper and deeper, until the rider can take his horse round a school in a counter-canter and finally perform a complete circle.  (This means going round to the left with the right leg leading, or vice versa).  Progress must be very gradual, and the rider must be content with a little at a time.  It is far better to go slowly and get it right, than to hurry in the early stages and then later have to correct other faults which have been produced by "forcing the pace".  Naturally the exercise must be practised equally on both reins.

     The counter-canter must not be confused with the disunited canter, which is an evasion and is always incorrect.  In the true canter, one pair of laterals (both legs on one side) should be in advance of the other pair (see above, under the heading "The Canter").  In the disunited canter, the horse is leading with the near-fore and the off-hind, or vice versa.

The walk from the canter

     The next exercise to teach the hose is the canter-to-walk.  This must only be attempted if the rider is quite sure the hose will answer his seat aids and relax his back muscles by producing more active hock action.  If the horse is at all stiff in the back, the rider will not be able to get a correct canter-to-walk and much resistance and throwing up of the horse's head will result, all of which will be very detrimental to the horse's training.

     It is best to start this movement on a fairly large circle, as the horse finds it easier to be balanced at the cater when not on a straight line.  Whilst keeping the horse bent slightly to the leading leg, the rider closes his legs, sits very deep and well down in the saddle and, by using strong seat and back-aids, supported by closed legs into resisting hands, pushes the horse's balance is such that he can pass straight into a walk.  This will not be accomplished the first time it is attempted, because it is probable that the horse will not be sufficiently in balance and will therefore have to take two or three steps at a trot.  If the rider's aids are not clear or strong enough, the horse will come back with his weight on his forehand.  The rider must make the horse canter more and more slowly by lowering the croup, and thus making him light in hand.  Only then can the horse pass straight into a walk.  As soon as the horse walks, the reins must immediately be relaxed and the horse allowed to walk freely on without any restriction.

The simple change

     When the foregoing movement has been successfully achieved, the rider may attempt a simple change of leg, but it is most important to get the canter-to-walk first.  It is also necessary before starting this exercise, to be sure that the horse will strike off into a canter on either leg on a straight line and be perfectly straight while doing so.  It would be a mistake to try a simple change of leg if the horse if the throws his quarters in when striking off into a canter, as it would only aggravate this fault and then there would be many difficulties to overcome in order to get a correct change of leg.  The reason for correct canter-aids is now obvious.

MANUAL OF HORSEMANSHIP

If the rider's inside leg and seat are used to the same extent as the outside leg, the horse will not learn this annoying habit of pushing his quarters to the inside when striking off into a canter, and there will be no need for any corrections.

     To practise the simple change of leg at the canter:-- Canter off on a named leg, perform a canter-to-walk and walk on for some distance before striking off on the other leg.  Gradually reduce the length of walk in between the canters until there are only two or three paces at the walk.  The resulting simple change of leg will have been performed with the greatest of ease.

Conclusion

     If this system of training is carefully adhered to, so that all resistance is reduced to a minimum before any difficult exercise is asked, the rider will find these exercises falling into his lap, like a ripe plum does from a tree, directly the horse understands what is required of him.  Because, having taught the horse obedience and how to relax, the rider does not have the dual task of teaching him simultaneously a new aid, and overcoming a resistance.  The secret is obedience--the proud result of correct training, which has caused the horse to five himself willingly and to obey with pleasure the indications of the rider.  This training will have developed the horse's muscles and suppled him, to such an extent as to make jumping easier.  It will also have got him into the habit of obedience, which will go a long way towards elimination the possibility of refusals when jumping.

ACKNOWLEDGEMENT

*The MANUAL of HORSEMANSHIP of  THE BRITISH HORSE SOCIETY and THE PONY CLUB

The British Horse Society makes acknowledgement to Educational Productions Ltd. for permission to reproduce illustrations by Joan Wanklyn from the book "Riding" by Mrs. V. D. S. Williams, and to Moss Bros. of Covent Garden and Geo. Parker & Sons, for the loan of bits illustrated on pages 29 and 30.

CONTENTS

Arrangement of this book.

     The book is divided into three parts dealing with Equitation, Saddlery and Horsemastership.

      Part I deals primarily with riding, the position of the rider and control of the horse or pony.

     There follow two appendices about elementary dressage.  Appendix I describes a system of training and Appendix II contains definitions of the various terms and movements.  The appendices deal with more advanced riding and movements than the earlier sections of the book.

     Part II deals with the fitting as well as with the care and cleaning of saddlery.  It also describes how        to put on and take off a saddle and bridle.

     Part III includes the handling and care of horses and ponies at grass and in stables;  also veterinary      notes, the identification of horses and ponies and road transport.

     

     The training of young horses and ponies is dealt with in a separate book "Training the Young Horse and Pony", also published by The British Horse Society.

     An index will be found at the end of the book.

Published by

THE BRITISH HORSE SOCIETY

NATIONAL EQUESTRIAN CENTRE

KENILWORTH, WARWICHSHIRE, CV8 2LR


PRINTED IN ENGLAND BY
NORTHBOURNE PRESS GROUP LIMITED 
COVENTRY CV2 3FU

Titled 'Silly Laws'

• Frankfort, Kentucky, makes it against the law to shoot off a policeman's tie.
• Horses are forbidden to eat fire hydrants in Marshalltown, Iowa.
• Idaho state law makes it illegal for a man to give his sweetheart a box of candy weighing less than fifty pounds.
• In Denver it is unlawful to lend your vacuum cleaner to your next-door neighbor.
• In Devon, Connecticut, it is unlawful to walk backwards after sunset.
• In Greene, New York, it is illegal to eat peanuts and walk backwards on the sidewalks when a concert is on.
• In Lexington, Kentucky, it's illegal to carry an ice cream cone in your pocket.
• In Memphis, Tennessee, it is illegal for a woman to drive a car unless there is a man either running or walking in front of it waving a red flag to warn approaching motorists and pedestrians.
• In Ohio, if you ignore an orator on Decoration day to such an extent as to publicly play croquet or pitch horseshoes within one mile of the speaker's stand, you can be fined $25.00.
• In Pocatello, Idaho, a law passed in 1912 provided that "The carrying of concealed weapons is forbidden, unless same are exhibited to public view."
• In Seattle, Washington, it is illegal to carry a concealed weapon that is over six feet in length.
• In Tennessee, it is illegal to shoot any game other than whales from a moving automobile.
• In Tulsa, Oklahoma, it is against the law to open a soda bottle without the supervision of a licensed engineer.
• It is against the law for a monster to enter the corporate limits of Urbana, Illinois.
• It is illegal to drive more than two thousand sheep down Hollywood Boulevard at one time.
• It is illegal to say "Oh, Boy" in Jonesboro, Georgia.
• It is Texas law that when two trains meet each other at a railroad crossing, each shall come to a full stop, and neither shall proceed until the other has gone.
• It's illegal in Wilbur, Washington, to ride an ugly horse.
• Kansas state law requires pedestrians crossing the highways at night to wear tail lights.
• Kirkland, Illinois, law forbids bees to fly over the village or through any of its streets.
• Minors in Kansas City, Missouri, are not allowed to purchase cap pistols; they may buy shotguns freely, however.
• New Hampshire law forbids you to tap your feet, nod your head, or in any way keep time to the music in a tavern, restaurant, or cafe.
• Texas law forbids anyone to have a pair of pliers in his possession.
• The Arkansas legislature passed a law that states that the Arkansas River can rise no higher than to the Main Street bridge in Little Rock.
• The City of Palo Alto, in its official description of parking lot standards, specifies the grade of wheelchair access ramps in terms of centimeters of rise per foot of run. A compromise...
• The penalty for laughing in a courtroom is six months in jail; if it were not for this penalty, the jury would never hear the evidence.-- H. L. Mencken
• The state law of Pennsylvania prohibits singing in the bathtub.
• There is a Massachusetts law requiring all dogs to have their hind legs tied during the month of April.
• Virginia law forbids bathtubs in the house; tubs must be kept in the yard.
• It is illegal to take more than 2 baths a month within Boston confines.
• Two people cannot kiss in front of a church.
• All Public Displays of Affection (PDAs) are forbidden on Sunday.
• Pedestrians always have the right of way.
• Anyone may let their sheep and cows graze in the public gardens/commons at any time except Sundays
• In Calgary there is a by-law that is still on the books that requires businesses within the city to provide rails for tying up horses.
• There is/was a law on the books in Washington state that stated that a motorcar driven at night must be preceded by something like 100 yards by a man carrying a lantern.....
• Stupid laws: In the England it is illegal to sell most goods on a Sunday, (this law is mostly ignored), it is however legal to sell a carrot. It is also legal to sell it at any price and to give free gifts with it, such as anything else one might want to buy on a sunday!
• Pennsylvania:
• In certain sections of Pennsylvania many years ago, the Farmer's Anti-Automobile society set up some "rules of the road." In effect, they said:
• 1. "Automobiles travelling on country roads at night must send up a rocket every mile, then wait ten minutes for the road to clear."
• 2. "If a driver sees a team of horses, he is to pull to one side of the road and cover his machine with a blanket or dust cover that has been painted to blend into the scenery."
• 3. "In the event that a horse refuses to pass a car on the road, the owner must take his car apart and conceal the parts in the bushes."
• Utah:
• It is against the law to fish from horseback.
• Ohio:
• In Bexley, Ordinance number 223, of 09/09/19 prohibits the installation and usage of slot machines in outhouses.
• Indiana:
• Back in 1924, a monkey was convicted in South Bend of the crime of smoking a cigarette and sentenced to pay a 25 dollar fine and the trial costs.
• Kansas:
• No one may catch fish with his bare hands in Kansas.
• California:
• In 1930, the City Council of Ontario passed an ordinance forbidding roosters to crow within the city limits.
• Kentucky:
• A Kentucky statute says:
• "No female shall appear in a bathing suit on any highway within this state unless she is escorted by at least two officers or unless she be armed with a club." Later, an amendment proposed: "The provisions of this statute shall not apply to any female weighing less than sixty pounds nor exceeding 200 pounds; nor shall it apply to female horses."
• Oklahoma:
• Harthahorne City Ordinance, Section 363, states that it shall be unlawful to put any hypnotized person in a display window.
• These excerpts are from the book "Loony Laws" by Robert Pelton (Walker; $8.95) Enjoy!
• In Ottumwa, Iowa, "It is unlawful for any male person, within the corporate limits of the (city), to wink at any female person with whom he is unaquainted."
• In Los Angeles, you cannot bathe two babies in the same tub at the same time.
• In Zion, Ill., it is illegal for anyone to give lighted cigars to dogs, cats, and other domesticated animals kept as pets.
• In Carmel, N.Y., a man can't go outside while wearing a jacket and pants that do not match.
• In Clawson, Mich., there is a law that makes it LEGAL for a farmer to sleep with his pigs, cows, horses, goats, and chickens.
• In Gary, Ind., persons are prohibited from attending a movie house or other theater and from riding a public streetcar within four hours of eating garlic.
• In Miami, it's illegal for men to be seen publicly in any kind of strapless gown.
• In St. Louis, it's illegal to sit on the curb of any city street and drink beer from a bucket.
• In Hartford, Conn., you aren't allowed to cross a street while walking on your hands.
• In Michigan, a woman isn't allowed to cut her own hair without her husband's permission.
• In Baltimore, it's illegal to throw bales of hay from a second-story window within the city limits. It's also illegal to take a lion to the movies.
• In Oxford, Ohio, it's illegal for a woman to strip off her clothing while standing in front of a man's picture.
• In Nicholas County, W. Va., no member of the clergy is allowed to tell jokes or humorous stories from the pulpit during a church service.
• In California, animals are banned from mating publicly within 1,500 feet of a tavern, school, or place of worship.
• In Pennsylvania, "any motorist driving along a country road at night must stop every mile and send up a rocket signal, wait 10 minutes for the road to be cleared of livestock, and continue."
• In Carrizozo, N.M., it's forbidden for a female to appear unshaven in public (includes legs and face).
• In Los Angeles, a man is legally entitled to beat his wife with a leather belt or strap, but the belt can't be wider than 2 inches, unless he has his wife's consent to beat her with a wider strap.
• In Kentucky, "No female shall appear in a bathing suit on any highway within this state unless she be escorted by at least two officers or unless she be armed with a club"
• An amendment to the above legislation: "The provisions of this statuate shall not apply to females weighing less than 90 pounds nor exceeding 200 pounds, nor shall it apply to female horses."

Source Fold at http://www.kubik.org/lighter/silly.htm

It’s illegal to ride an ugly horse in Wilbur, Washington

by mckenna mckenna on 24 October 2013

Transcript of It’s illegal to ride an ugly horse in Wilbur, Washington

It’s illegal to ride an ugly horse in Wilbur, Washington
In Tennessee, it is illegal for children to play games on Sunday without a license
In Arizona, a man may legally beat his wife once a month, but no more
In Eureka, Nevada, it is illegal for men who have mustaches to kiss women.

You Can’t Do That!

Most people think that the nation government is in complete control over the U.S. but each makes their own laws as long as they obey the constitution and the national government.

States are denied this power because the
didn’t want the states
to have the power to become their own county.

Often states require a license to practice a profession in their state such as..
Hairdresser
Teacher
Doctor
Lawyer

Just because you have a license in
one state doesn’t mean it will work
in another.

The powers not delegated to the United States by the Constitution, nor prohibited by it to the States, are reserved to the States respectively, or to the people.

10th Amendment

It is illegal to spit on a sidewalk in Dodge City, Kansas.
Hitting a vending machine that stole your money is illegal in Derby, Kansas.
No one may sing the alphabet on the streets at night in Topeka, Kansas.
Snowball fights are illegal in Topeka, Kansas.

Did You Know…

Powers may be denies because they interfere with the national government or with the constitution.
Examples: No state has the power to…
Enter a treaty
Enter an Alliance
Enter into Confederations
print or coin their own money.
Deprive any person of life, liberty, or property with out due process of law.


Powers Denied by the States

The States

Powers Reserved to the States

Can forbid persons under 18 to marry without parent consent.
Ban sale of pornography
outlaw prostitution
permit some forms of gambling. 

Horse

Definitions

• 

  Ye Olde Running Horse Inn, Leatherhead
• WordNet 3.6
  • v horse provide with a horse or horses
  • n horse solid-hoofed herbivorous quadruped domesticated since prehistoric times
  • n horse a padded gymnastic apparatus on legs
  • n horse a chessman shaped to resemble the head of a horse; can move two squares horizontally and one vertically (or vice versa)
  • n horse a framework for holding wood that is being sawed
  • n horse troops trained to fight on horseback "500 horse led the attack"
  • ***

---

Additional illustrations & photos:

Rip-Sawing on a Horse

THE HORSE

Passing of the horse

WHERE A HORSE WAS SWALLOWED UP

Riders on horses

Rding a wooden horse

Horse and Man

A PROFITABLE HORSE TRADE

---

Webster's Revised Unabridged Dictionary

• Interesting fact:Horses can sleep while standing upright.
• • Horse heroin.
  • Horse horsepower.
  • Horse (Naut) A breastband for a leadsman.
  • Horse A frame of timber, shaped like a horse, on which soldiers were made to ride for punishment.
  • Horse A frame with legs, used to support something; as, a clotheshorse, a sawhorse, etc.
  • Horse (Zoöl) A hoofed quadruped of the genus Equus; especially, the domestic horse (Equus caballus), which was domesticated in Egypt and Asia at a very early period. It has six broad molars, on each side of each jaw, with six incisors, and two canine teeth, both above and below. The mares usually have the canine teeth rudimentary or wanting. The horse differs from the true asses, in having a long, flowing mane, and the tail bushy to the base. Unlike the asses it has callosities, or chestnuts, on all its legs. The horse excels in strength, speed, docility, courage, and nobleness of character, and is used for drawing, carrying, bearing a rider, and like purposes.
  • Horse (Naut) A jackstay.
  • Horse (Mining) A mass of earthy matter, or rock of the same character as the wall rock, occurring in the course of a vein, as of coal or ore; hence, to take horsesaid of a vein -- is to divide into branches for a distance.
  • Horse (Student Slang) A translation or other illegitimate aid in study or examination; -- called also trotpony Dobbin.
  • Horse (Naut) An iron bar for a sheet traveler to slide upon.
  • Horse Anything, actual or figurative, on which one rides as on a horse; a hobby.
  • Horse (Student Slang) Horseplay; tomfoolery.
  • Horse Mounted soldiery; cavalry; -- used without the plural termination; as, a regiment of horse ; -- distinguished from foot."The armies were appointed, consisting of twenty-five thousand horse and foot."
  • Horse (Naut) See Footrope a.
  • Horse The male of the genus Equus, in distinction from the female or male; usually, a castrated male.
  • v. i Horse To get on horseback.
  • Horse To mate with (a mare); -- said of the male.
  • Horse To place on the back of another, or on a wooden horse, etc., to be flogged; to subject to such punishment.
  • Horse To provide with a horse, or with horses; to mount on, or as on, a horse."Being better horsed , outrode me."
  • Horse To sit astride of; to bestride.
  • Horse To take or carry on the back; as, the keeper, horsing a deer.
  • ***

Century Dictionary and Cyclopedia

• Interesting fact:In Wyoming it is illegal to tattoo a horse with the intent of making it unrecognizable to its owner.
• • n horse A solidungulate perissodactyl mammal of the family Equidœ and genus Equus; E. caballus. It has a flowing mane and tail, comparatively small erect ears, comparatively large rounded hoofs, shapely head, arched neck, a callosity on the inner side of the hind leg below the hock, in addition to one on the fore leg above the so-called “knee,” and a peculiar voice called a “neigh.” These are the principal distinctive characters of the existing horses, of whatever variety, in comparison with the asses and zebras, which are commonly placed in the same genus (Equus). The horse has no distinctive coloration, but is never conspicuously striped in any regular pattern, and seldom shows even the dorsal and shoulder stripe characteristic of the ass, though there is often an indication of this marking in horses which have reverted to a feral state and tend to assume a dun color. The horse is now known only as a domesticated and artificially bred animal, though in both North and South America, in Australia, and in some parts of Asia the descendants of domesticated ancestors run wild in troops. The native country of the horse and the period of its subjection to man are unknown. Animals congeneric with the present horse, if not conspecific, have left their remains with those of the mammoth and other extinct animals in the bone-caves of both the old and new worlds, but the genus Equus appears not to have been fully established before the close of the Pliocene. The evolution of the modern forms has been traced back through the whole Tertiary period, by the discovery of such genera as Hipparion and Pliohippus of the Pliocene, Anchitherium, Miohippus, and Mesohippus of the Miocene, and Orohippus and Eohippus of the Eocene. In the course of this evolutionary series is observed a very gradual and unbroken geologic pedigree, going back to a small animal, not larger than a fox, with several separate toes on each foot. The size has steadily increased, and other progressive modifications, especially of the limbs, have resulted in the existing horse in all its numberless artificial breeds, races, and strains, combining in various degrees the qualities of size, strength, speed, and bottom. Two breeds—namely, the large, powerful, black breed of Flanders, and the Arabian — have contributed more than all others to develop the present varieties. The former laid the foundation of size, strength, and vigor for draft-horses and for those formerly used in war; while, when mailed armor was laid aside, and the horse began to be used for the chase, the latter conferred the speed and endurance which distinguish the hunter. The ladies’ palfrey is largely derived from the Spanish genet, a small, beautiful, fleet variety of the Moorish barb. The race-horse has less of Flemish and more of Arabian blood. Other leading varieties are the Suffolk Punch and Clydesdale, both chiefly of Flemish blood, and best for draft and agriculture; and several varieties of ponies, as Galloway, Shetland, etc. Carriage, riding, and other horses combine the above breeds in varying degrees, as speed, endurance, strength, or size, etc., may be required. Horses are said to have “blood” or “breeding” in proportion as they have a greater or less strain of Arab blood. The wild horse of Tatary is called a tarpan, that of northern Africa a koomrah, and that of America a mustang, the last being descended from imported Spanish parents. The male of the horse is a stallion; when gelded, a gelding; the female is a mare; the young, a foal—if a male, a colt, if a female, a filly. The colt and filly become “of age” when the “corner-nippers” (outer incisors) attain functional development. The age of the horse may be determined by the marks on the front teeth, which change with the wearing down of the crowns by use. When the mark disappears. as it generally does in the eighth or ninth year, the horse is “aged.” The period of gestation is eleven months, and foals are generally dropped in the spring. Horses vary greatly in size, some standing more than twice as high as others. Very small horses are called ponies, as those bred in Shetland.
  • n horse plural In zoology, the horse family, or Equidæ; the species of the genus Equus and related genera. These include all the existing asses of the restricted genus Asinus, and the quagga, dauw, and zebra, of the restricted genus Hippotigris, together with all the extinct forms of the Tertiary period which, however different from the modern horse, are connected closely by intermediate links. See Equidœ.
  • n horse The male of the horse kind, in distinction from the female or mare; a stallion or gelding.
  • n horse A body of troops serving on horseback: cavalry: in this sense a collective noun, used also as a plural: as, a regiment of horse.
  • n horse A frame, block, board, or the like, on which something is mounted or supported, or the use of which is in any way analogous to that of a horse. Compare etymology of easel.
  • n horse Specifically— A vaulting-block in a gymnasium.
  • n horse A wooden frame on which soldiers are made to ride as a punishment: sometimes called a timber mare.
  • n horse A saw-horse.
  • n horse A clothes-horse.
  • n horse A currier’ board, used in dressing hides.
  • n horse In printing, a sloping board, with its support, placed on the bank close to the tympan of a hand-press, on which is laid the paper to be printed.
  • n horse A support for the cables of a suspension-bridge.
  • n horse A board on which the workman sits in grinding the bevels and edges of tools in their manufacture. Also horsing.
  • n horse In mining, a mass of rock inclosed within a lode or vein, usually of the same material as the “country,” or rock adjacent to the lode on each side.
  • n horse In metallurgy, same as bear, 7.
  • n horse An implement or a device for some service suggesting or supposed to suggest that of a horse. Specifically— A clamp for holding screws for filing.
  • n horse Nautical: A foot-rope.
  • n horse A jack-stay, on the forward or after side of a mast, on which a sail or yard is hoisted.
  • n horse A traveler for the sheet-block of a fore-and-aft sail, consisting of a horizontal bar of wood or iron.
  • n horse The iron bar between the posts of a fife-rail to which the leading-blocks are fastened.
  • n horse A translation or similar forbidden aid used by a pupil in the preparation of his lessons; a “pony”; a “trot”; a “crib”: so called as helping the pupil to get on faster.
  • n horse Among British workmen, work charged for before it is executed.
  • n horse A term of opprobrium. Compare ass, similarly used.
  • n horse [Horse, as the first element of a compound. indicates a large or coarse thing of its kind: as, horse-chestnut, horse-crab, horse-mackerel, horse-play, etc.]
  • n horse Hence— Any competitor for or recipient of a prize, honors, or office concerning whom nothing certain is known, or whose identity is at first concealed, as for reasons of strategy; one who is unexpectedly brought forward as a candidate, or for nomination in a convention: much used in American politics.
  • n horse The cavalry and infantry — that is, the whole army: as, they were routed, horse, foot, and dragoons.
  • n horse As used adverbially, indiscriminately; without favor.
  • n horse Take horse; mount: used absolutely, as a signal or command.
  • n horse To be covered, as a mare.
  • n horse In mining, to divide into branches for a distance: said of a vein.
  • horse To provide with a horse; supply horses for, as a body of cavalry, etc.
  • horse To sit astride; bestride.
  • horse To cover: said of the male.
  • horse To mount or place on or as on the back of a horse; set on horseback; hence, to take on one's own back.
  • horse To mount on another's back preparatory to flogging.
  • horse Nautical, to “ride” hard; drive or urge at work unfairly or tyrannically: as, to horse a ship's crew.
  • horse To make out or learn by means of a translation or other extrinsic aid: as, to horse a lesson in Virgil.
  • horse To get on horseback; mount or ride on a horse.
  • horse To charge for work before it is executed.
  • horse In calking, to embed firmly in the seams of a ship, as oakum, with a horsing-iron and a mallet: often with up.
  • horse An obsolete form of hoarse.
  • n horse The researches of Ewart, Osborn, and others show the probability that the modern horse, like the dog, has been derived from several sources. Prjevalsky's horse is considered to be one of these, while two other forms are recognized—the Celtic pony and the Norse horse.
  • n horse One of the inclined timbers in a staircase which support the steps.
  • n horse In mining: A lenticular bod of shale or old channel fillings which cuts out coal-seams.
  • n horse In chess, same as knight.
  • n horse In astronomy, the constellation of Pegasus (see flying horse); also, the equine part of Sagittarius (represented as a centaur).
  • n horse A Danish silver coin of the value of 1 s. 2 d.
  • horse To hang (as skins) over a wooden horse or stand.
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Chambers's Twentieth Century Dictionary

• Interesting fact:It's illegal in Wilbur, Washington, to ride an ugly horse.
• • n Horse hors a well-known quadruped:
  • v.t Horse to mount on a horse: to provide with a horse: to sit astride: to carry on the back: to urge at work tyrannically: to construe by means of a crib
  • v.i Horse to get on horseback: to charge for work before it is done
  • adj Horse of reddish-bronze colour
  • adj Horse shaped like a horse-shoe
  • v.t Horse to strike with a horse-whip: to lash
  • n Horse hors (collectively) cavalry: that by which something is supported, as 'clothes-horse,' &c.: a wooden frame on which soldiers were formerly made to ride as a punishment—also Timber-mare: a boy's crib, a translation