A Tiered State

Held in Bank of Memory mount,

a recorded 'Blind of Disguise' in Rite,

placed in the center for ritualized 'Sight',

Hooded Men encircled Star,

a pentagram made Red this night of Might.

Made for 'Purpose' to deliver the Knowledge held,

became delivered as I visit Hell.

Conspirators attempt,

Laymen try,

but until you experience to know the Sentence,

you should back-off,

ask repentance.

Many guess and proclaim to be,

however this still remains a Mystery.

At hand you mock the power of,

doubt the Act,

point the finger and now 'Just Dues,'

the Owl is Back and calls from you!!

To scoff at actions,

Ancient Ways,

I believe that most do not give 'Way'.

To much Info teams the Net,

but as you say you only bet,

possess no wisdom or,

'Know of Set!!'.

As Silence is Their gain,

the question of,

is no game.

In reality these things are done,

and 'The Serious' become the Gun.

Shots are Words,

spoken Fare,

to engage, to contact, proof in meant,

to 'Ask' the Demons,

many sent. 

An Allegiance!!

The deeper Tell to visit Hell,

takes no faith in Religious wares,

for the missing piece of need,

was the B.D.S.M Men to See.

So People sneak,

hide camera's as well,

to prove existence and to tell,

of what 'See's' best, in what invests,

as if exposing changes views,

in the end you'll just regret.

For in the truth,

which does lie,

deep beneath the earth at nite,

torches burn in candlelight,

fire churns, man out of sight.

In this Venue you would turn,

as if to say,

there are Degrees and Masters read,

and should you leave all will seethe.

Scores are written,

a registry, a lair,

the more you know,

the bigger the fare.

The interest great,

the purpose known,

'Why?' delve in when you're not shown.

The whole point is to restrict,

kept with men and secrets known,

in 'An Order' to advance 'The Take' in Sake.

So as you're placed in circle's face,

it is a race to hold the pace,

very few can return you,

from the deepest points of do.

To lose your 'Mind' insight of 'Times,'

is not good but considered sublime.

In ready mind,

'Sent' unkind,

'Show' develops where 'Hooded Men' stood.

In a slow and certain motion,

down you go and up 'they' come,

in the middle no-one runs.

To have 'Sight,'

understanding 'Therewit,'

it is the Men of B.D.S.M. that hold with 'Whips.'

As 'These' men did do 'No Deed,'

'They' were not the Ones I knew,

sunk inside this darkened tomb,

'They' tapped-in as I was 'Tell.'

Left in horror of this 'Plight,'

I still do venture,

in 'Third-Eye' right?

For 'They' just left me in this flight,

there I was in midst of 'Fight.'

Battled through for 'myself,'

in this gained freedom,

I found 'Well,'

the 'Deal' was hard,

the 'Cards' just dealt.

Retained the wisdom,

familiar words,

delivered 'Language' not understood.

Now a 'Two-Week' vacation,

a 'Retreat,'

delivers ceremony without relief.

In Centuries past,

this 'Path' of 'Use,'

has been blocked,

said uncouth.

As it seems practiced today,

although believed to be a 'Play,'

it is No-Game,

and yet some cry to be let in,

to testify or 'Show' what's been.

As does Innocence say to You,

'Why?' go see a Want or View,

if Faith in Such must be reviewed?

Is it to 'Out?'

state untrue?,

or to touch upon a morbid view?

Does it matter what Men do?,

if your blurbs answers knew?

Motives drive the silence true,

with this aspect you still pursue,

not for Knowledge,

not for Truth but to enhance a 'Point-of-View,'

of what you say is not new.

Does it matter,

I think so and in this 'Note' I do write,

what is sought is done at night,

it does remain in plain sight.

The trick is in the knowing of,

there's not just 'One,'

but many love,

this 'Order' of,

 Rites!!

Flashbacks Enable Us To Move Through

There were these Days,

so long ago,

I was young,

my Mind doth remind.

In a Basement frame,

the sight of such a Horror!!

It happened more than once,

it seemed Their heavens door.

As first such FRIGHT,

the FEAR was found,

pushed down upon the ground!!

As I did resist,

my size became so easily licked,

the hatred turned to bliss,

I shut my EYES for this.

With EACH increased FIGHT,

enhanced my personal plight,

I saw within these boys,

my fear was met with sight.

Upon these ACTS of DARKEST FAIR,

these Boys would pay Their way,

I saw the spite within Their eyes,

causing such despair.

I HAD to LEARN,

to STARE them down,

on my back I laid.

I LOOKED into Their EYES,

with hatred for this ACT,

then upon this One Time hist',

the blank stare blinked right back.

The WRATH which began,

increased through the line,

each ONE sought the fight,

insisting it was right: Deserved.

The roughness on Their part,

caused me to erupt,

but I did not back off this stare,

my only refuge there!!

As Their ability to accomplish act,

began to wane 'cause I fought back,

my eyes, my stare began to make,

these Boys incapable to complete this Take.

 The Fear inside of myself,

which I had to defeat to become well,

became what angered me in this place.

Years and Years did pass,

before I understood Their Wrath,

Expressions of Theirs,

I only remember,

the sticky, disgusting shared.

The strangeness in these days,

reveals things not nice,

not a test, not whats best,

just absurd exists in their.

Myself, I learned to hate,

the Act which brought the RAGE,

my EYES became the BAIT!!

Restrained by size,

I did give way,

in this I could only persist,

to OPEN my EYES,

not close and wish,

"Is this the day I die?"

When SENSE brought ATTACKERS madness,

I witnessed death in Their Eyes,

I watched insanity walk away,

the danger was so grave.

Although my life went on each day,

this Act killed me too,

my innocence was taken,

the rage made me New!!

My loss became my gain,

exhaustion delivered disdain,

my life bares this kill,

I know that what was done,

impacted more than (One) Won!!

I know that peace can be found,

to puzzle my past in present.

These Ill's of which I speak,

has brought so much relief!!

Not to reside in these times,

but to bring to complete,

so I may turn the Page with Age,

to deliver Times of Pain,

in the birth of brand new day.

I know that in past pleads,

I wished to wish for a particular relief,

but Reality is my Rule,

and the wish did seem so cool.

Grateful for the Sight,

the Might gives Way to Passed,

but I still Wish for You,

a day where Twin Souls rule.

The passion felt surreal,

brought me strength,

and paved my path,

to face this life of terror.

Thank you for your care!!

The Death In Flash-Back

Wretched Memories,

of moments past,

as a child survivor of hideous things!

Haunted by ugly times,

where breath escaped me.

As I Stood in Death

I Gasp, in Horror,

an anxious reaction,

to having none.

Fraught with the instant of haste,

I capture myself today.

Halted I Am!

What went wrong?

What had I done?

Little I know,

Small I was,

that Night I Passed-Over though.

Not to a Fall,

but to what I Saw!

Comforts Now!

While Standing,

in dead space,

I stared at me.

Lying dead until the Squall

To the issuance of late,

I Speak gingerly.

With guarded tongue,

I wait.

The Horror, the Fear,

tips this next gear,

shifting into Want

of a Peer!

With cautious Tone,

I lay with only Me,

Alone, but not lonely,

I find Life so Deep.

The careful detail

Interest Peeks

what hides inside of me:

So Painful.

Dangerously I very softly creep,

as flashbacks do reap.

In the depths of these darkened times,

I cannot speak,

silence befalls,

as my mind is a keep!!

Banked on Account

Nature withdraws,

as I become so small,

I've locked these things-up.

To Deal, to Touch,

on an occasional try,

just to unwind this Grave.

To Frightened,

paralyzed with 'Memory Fear'

I wretch,

my body racks,

as my Mind does 'Spin-to-Time'.

Am I of an Age,

to Unlock this Cage,

and not be afraid of the Curtain,

which Covers-for-Certain,

Events I've Entombed?

Never did I think

that these locks would fail.

A Sure and Safe-Way to Nail,

shut-times,

that cause erupt.

Out of My Control,

the Tumbler Found.

Keys I still hide,

as I know I did Die!!

Ceremoniously I scream,

to no avail;

"As this seems Nature's Tale."

The Proper Preparation for............

As Life delivers the next wipe-out,

I ready myself;  Feeling no strife.

"I Live"

Do not despair, just repair yourself.

Knowing not your own complications,

until the strength you do have, appears.

For in this thought, I deliver honesty.

"I'm able"

Pain will only plague you, if, you deny.

In it's stead, agony steps-up to remind,

of what is not but could never be.

"Just 'cause"

For a Million-Ten is not 1000 Years.

You've already been and I bid you you're due!

 A promise to self is bound by stealth.

 "Knowing,"

  is believing in myself.

~

The Truth Makes Me......Know that the Fight is Worth my Life

Cruelty towards another person is common place today.

Kindly verse to counter such twistedness is rare.

Seemingly, a person will throw not a defense,

but will be what they seem to be so naturally;

Repulsively rude.

I do look for each and every type of way to be towards this;

I trip upon my own sensitivity.

On this I must resist.

The injury of or damage to a like-minded Soul;

I guess I am just not whole.

However, the destruction of Innocence for Entertainment is more.

It becomes what I would call a Sadistic Roll.

Why destroy what does not hunt you?

Why tear down what is trying not to bind?

Why cover your controlling Mind,

with the fraudulent mix of what you sign?

Each One!

A Human Being; Has the ability to shine!

Honesty is,

a rare, unique, a special find.

Be the individual that is not blind.

Gain your sight through patience and by design.

Force not an opinion down one being or another.

The freedom of Belief is the Innocence of Life.

To refer, to show, such disgust towards belief of times,

when Civilizations have been lost,

due to murderous ways of the few.

Is a disappointment and should be the shame that is due. 

We have lost,

"The Incan, The Aztec, The Mayan."

As fear still inhabits man as we near the date predicted to be,

the end.

Murdered, burned out; Human Beings.

Left to rot from sickness,

which we brought.

Yet! We Fear what they held dear, their own "Spirituality."

Not matching our own destruction,

thus, this has become ours to own,

and slavery seems our zone.

Now down to the bone ~ 2012,

has a war of it's own.

A marked day, a given month, 

to recover what has roamed.

To near the calendar-less claims,

the Timeless Tells of Centuries past.

I am not shocked at the speed of which Humanity searches for relief,

of the guilt, of the wipe-out, of what really may have just been: Choice.

The Secret of the Universe!

Choice

~

"The Horse is Dead-Dismount!"

"Indeed.  Dismount.  Time for a burial and a nice graveside ceremony.  Shoot a few rounds of blanks into the sky;  Shout a couple of Hallelujahs and 'Blessed Be's;'  Offer a burnt sacrifice by way of dried narcissus and dehydrated garlic, but grieve it ~ and leave it."

Author Unknown

Inside of the insidious thought lies in residence and in pensive detail a Mind.  A Mind of the trapped kind.  Not by what is, but, rather by what was.  It is the history we store for reasons unknown, that seems to create the future in which we will one day inevitably end-up living our lives.  In this life of gracious acceptance of our past as our instructive merit to "Duty and Honor," we may find that our voids will be filled, our wants become null and our needs recognized as extras afforded to us by the design of Nature in her wonderment.

The ability of what is unknown becoming known to us, is as adventure of the thrill-seeking individual.  Understanding that one hand within the other, brings us to the heights of "Why" we begin a Journey or seek to go on a Quest is imperative to such an idea.  This must be a category unto its own.

Believing that we are each here for a specific purpose, then I believe that birth delivered with us "Innocence."  With such gifts, much like this one, which were bestowed upon us at our deliverance into this World, we are capable of breathing in the Heir of Life-Itself, in order to enhance our time while under Mother Nature's watch.

The Big Bang Created Me

Delivered into the mouth of an Ancient Dragon.

This is what I know to be,

this is "Me."

Always was, and, always will be.

I am only a child in a World not known,

a World lost to all who knew of such things.

My Father created Me!

He called upon his father's father,

and father's father.

He called upon an ancient line of ancestors,

a linear view of what he knew.

And thus, he broke the rules.

For in his death, he gave me life,

and, death is what I know life to be.

Do Not Speak!

To utter even one word may cause a person to smash your World.

A small and fragile state.

My Mind is a sensitive kind.

Never telling in full report,

the details of what haunts my Port.

Each and every word,

pours upon my wounds; It hurts.

I feel left inside a Storm.

Thrown the occasional Sail; It's torn.

One day I will sew my mend,

and understand that I can,

start again.

With my eyes I will shout my lore.

I cannot find, but cease my more.

Healing me,

while staying safe,

from those Nightmares that you state.

Intellectual Heir Of Mind

To be privy to what has passed,

is the simplicity of birth itself.

Turning from what is brought with you,

complicates this type of view.

The moment that reality bites upon your life,

shock occurs.

The further from this belief,

becomes what is not innocent relief.

Stalemate is nothing more,

than denial of what is.

Practicality and Reason can be,

more than what is actually seen.

Popularity often bleeds unnaturally,

the need or want to glean!!

I'm not afraid!

"Not Afraid"

[Chorus:]
I'm not afraid (I'm not afraid)
To take a stand (to take a stand)
Everybody (everybody)
Come take my hand (come take my hand)
We'll walk this road together, through the storm
Whatever weather, cold or warm
Just lettin you know that, you're not alone
Holla if you feel like you've been down the same road (same road)

[Intro (during Chorus):]
Yeah, it's been a ride
I guess I had to, go to that place, to get to this one
Now some of you, might still be in that place
If you're trying to get out, just follow me
I'll get you there

You could try and read my lyrics off of this paper before I lay 'em
But you won't take the sting out these words before I say 'em
Cause ain't no way I'ma let you stop me from causin mayhem
When I say I'ma do somethin I do it,
I don't give a damn what you think,
I'm doin this for me, so fuck the world
Feed it beans, it's gassed up, if it thinks it's stoppin me
I'ma be what I set out to be, without a doubt undoubtedly
And all those who look down on me I'm tearin down your balcony
No if ands or buts, don't try to ask him why or how can he
From "Infinite" down to the last "Relapse" album
he's still shittin, whether he's on salary paid hourly
Until he bows out or he shits his bowels out of him
Whichever comes first, for better or worse
He's married to the game, like a fuck you for Christmas
His gift is a curse, forget the Earth, he's got the urge
to pull his dick from the dirt, and fuck the whole universe

[Chorus]

Okay quit playing with the scissors and shit, and cut the crap
I shouldn't have to rhyme these words in the rhythm for you to know it's a rap
You said you was king, you lied through your teeth, for that
Fuck your feelings, instead of gettin crowned you're gettin capped
And to the fans, I'll never let you down again, I'm back
I promise to never go back on that promise, in fact
Let's be honest, that last "Relapse" CD was ehhh
Perhaps I ran them accents into the ground
Relax, I ain't goin back to that now
All I'm tryin to say is get back, click-clack, blaow
Cause I ain't playin around
It's a game called circle and I don't know how, I'm way too up to back down
But I think I'm still tryin to figure this crap out
Thought I had it mapped out but I guess I didn't, this fuckin black cloud
still follows, me around but it's time to exorcise these demons
These motherfuckers are doin jumpin jacks now!

[Chorus]

And I just can't keep living this way
So starting today, I'm breaking out of this cage
I'm standing up, I'ma face my demons
I'm manning up, I'ma hold my ground
I've had enough, now I'm so fed up
Time to put my life back together right now! (now)

It was my decision to get clean, I did it for me
Admittedly, I probably did it subliminally
for you, so I could come back a brand new me you helped see me through
And don't even realize what you did, believe me you
I been through the ringer, but they could do little to the middle finger
I think I got a tear in my eye, I feel like the king of
my world, haters can make like bees with no stingers
and drop dead, no more beef flingers
No more drama from now on, I promise
to focus solely on handlin my responsibilities as a father
So I solemnly swear to always treat this roof, like my daughters
and raise it, you couldn't lift a single shingle on it!
Cause the way I feel, I'm strong enough to go to the club
or the corner pub, and lift the whole liquor counter up
Cause I'm raising the bar
I'd shoot for the moon but I'm too busy gazin at stars
I feel amazing and I'm

[Chorus]