Tuesday, August 9, 2011

Twisted Words for you to See. I am sorry, not for thee.

The hurt I dump on top of you
is not mine but you must find.
I Stand up and off I run
back to face what you have done.

Here I come to say to you
that you were my mother, meant to protect
left me for people to abuse and neglect
never did you say, "I fret."

Let your conscience know I'm free
I'm your daughter, born of thee
I'm not afraid of you or me
'cause you have a date you soon must meet.

I hate you now, like I did then
loved no one 'cause that was sin
beat by your words, pointing to them
took me in to do it again.

All alone because of you
I'm ready to do what I must too
I will not let you get through
this life you live bids you due.

I felt the power of your abuse
severe neglect was my noose
your life, liberty or advancing age
I do this with the voice of rage.

I tried to love but hate won out
confused, locked up, let me tout
my revenge is all about
tomorrow, today is why I say.......

I won't stop until the plot
tells a story I heard a lot
winning all is what you sought
can you ever know your bought?

All of them that followed you
it's a sin I won't undo
close your eyes and know their blue
'cause you took, they wouldn't sue.

never putting things aside
you must win, you must abide
inside the minds of those that hide
so that you know that you are high.

Never will I stop to say
upside down and backwards play
love is hate and lies are true
now this noose is choking you.

You will never rule my own,
they will know confusion roams
through the words and actions of
you and yours expose this love.

Liars,liars in this its true
heartless attacks of what I do
in fear that I will show your hand
destroyed me when I wrote "God damn."

Rage and anger rule my days
recovery  I won't engage
my life is focused on this page
you will be the one enraged.

I hate you!  And to you, Mom,  this means Love.  This is what you always taught me. Love is hate and hate is love.  Why would you do this to your own flesh and blood? It has never made much sense to me and it has been impossible to explain to anyone,ever.  Until I found this on the web and there it was right in front of me. A dictionary that I agree with and finally it explains to the layman how confused a person like me might be as an adult.  Should that same layman take the time to read this link, then they will be able to understand you much better. It explains the cruelty that you delve out to your children, your Grandchildren and to unsuspecting strangers too.