The Sundown of a best friend named Eden

I am in loneliness of pain itself.

Never knowing that with age brought death.

My Best Friend, Eden Sundown no longer lives,

he hanged himself at home.

Alone I am, so many gone, not even one Comrade left,

to sit and watch this life of ours,

my tears are all my own.

The need or want to speak leaves me

with each passing day that sadness grows.

These feeble words or verses here,

just attempts at redemption to plea.

My thoughts are torn,

his demise is felt, in heaviness and fear.

Who thought that he would take his life,

all be it, it was his choice to do.

Society screams, it does declare,

such rules and horrors,

I'm scared.

I worry for his Soul!

Do you keep your Heart?

These are not worries for the faint of heart,

I just worry in silence, I have from the start.

I sent a letter to the ones,

I thought could offer solace.

The Dali Lama is to old,

and India was not so bold, no contact or rapport.

My quest for such did end with this,

I sought no more advice.

Such bounds or prices he must pay,

upon this one lost life.

I wish to be the debtor here,

to pay the price for he.

For Best Friends we will always be,

he'd do the same for me.

I give up not at all to do the right thing that I think.

Should you be subject or feel such loss,

I wish for you the best.

It's difficult enough to feel, is this just a test?

To Consider the Shock of the Light and the Dark

Lightning, Thunder, Nature Rolls,

a natural riddle rhymes.

With salt & pepper, a super wealth,

no country desires this stealth.

I glide into humanity.

The view is of a Sty.

I look to see it is not me

and guide myself from thee.

In such naked exposure,

a shot to never take.

Will my life turn over

or does the Clover make......?

Prepare for bedtime stories,

of flights in life not made.

Dream at night of what you'll be,

while I bow out so gracefully.

No Deed will go unpunished.

No Song will ever play.

In what a life of strife has done,

no interest: I am threw.

An easy and a planned escape,

look out for past mistakes.

Don't point the finger at each other!

I heard four point you.

I'd ask for an opinion,

but, so many judge this road.

Perdition was a Movie.

My life, I try to live.

Although I seem to just exist.

Do not knock this path I'm on.

I do believe you must do this

before you try to row.

To try to do or complete such feats,

will prove to be a song.

Getting on with all you must,

I levy,

"Who do you trust?"

Questioning does not beg itself!

It's the indifference that is in between.

Spouting out your next move,

"Do you play Chess with Life?"

So easily you count; You do!!

Make sense to me?  "I don't think so."

The noise between us seems to grow,

while yelling out the score.

Do you stop to smell a Rose?

How does this plan strike you?

Complaining words is all I hear,

it streams across everywhere.

To end the madness one final time,

will cause most skin to crawl.

Spout out the reasons to listen to

on how it's treason due.

Be not the voice that needs to speak.

Leadership is more!

The greater a person walks to be,

the less the fight in Me.

Falter at Never

Children need no appeal.

An ear, a voice, a stand,

most definitely.

For at that point, no genius helps.

For what good would such a talent be?

When crushed by family.

A heart to give, a soul to take,

it is easier to say these days.

The years have passed; blindly I stare.

At nothing, but, "I'm hosed."

A cold and hardened plight,

it does grow rather old.

So many years to put away,

all before my 18th birth arrived.

When Legal hit a freedom fight

to breath the air of might!

Hours never passed, the minutes held the time.

In negativity I did count

the seconds of my wealth waned.

I found the struggle incomparable.

NEVER, put pen to paper.

Certainly do not speak with voice.

The levity of such a crime

brought beatings with no choice.

My spine is racked with pain.

The daily grind I bare that's mine.

In spite of all of you,

I knew the term....

Begin again.

A Direction of Difference

 

Waiting at the end?

Don't.

No reply is ever needed,

if you cannot rely on any one person to show.

Assumptions seem to layer most of the minds today.

In death you think the same way too.

Your curiosity, it seems,

still does interest me.

Why would "They" be waiting?

A relative, you persist.

Do you take so readily?

That which you hear; Exists?

Why than do you sharply

turn from other words of difference?

Not only do you close your mind,

but, you stop!, to turn away at any and all kinds of different thought of the same or similar.

Renouncing all that is said,

do you even read?

Any word? Or maybe just one?

No, you judge and throw behind this verse,

so blindly you disregard.

Underneath this cruelty

that the critics seem to spew.

Even more of this new dynamic thought,

it just seems to bother you.

Is it the unspoken language heard?

The never written verse?

A Riddle in the making,

or, the unending of perverse?

Could it be the very,

indecent proposal of,

what is not just supposed,

but, spoken and written in Love?

Confusion does not merit,

an interest in my life.

For if you were to tarry,

you would find I'm not so nice.

I charge for all my mights.

I will come both day and night.

I am so simply bored,

with assumptions and the more.

It seems there's always digging:)

A delightful excitement breeds,

not just for the anxious,

but for the curious I see.

Fight the impending tide,

of all that read, not type.

You get for free a show from Me

of wonder and delight.

Am I so uptight? A Riddler that just likes?

Of course I must be, but do I sound,

I pose the question lightly,

for I write only, what challenges me, upon this Earth tonight.

I write the words and develop the prose that causes so much strife.

Do you ever seek?

That which is "The Meek?"

For if you do not possess,

a talent or a test,

than left you are for all of them

and Death is left for Me.

Assisting A find

Adoring what?

A question for whom?

No calls, never answer,

a voice not heard.

You will miss, not.

A heart beat: No sound.

A rhythm not felt.

Walking into a set-up?

Forward facing recommended.

Life, Death, Existence?

Which one frowns upon a self-made being?

Reading Mans words fills the voids.

Writing ones thoughts, is it a sin?

Dependent upon the stimuli?

Everyday a vixen.

Abhor?

No better... No worse.

The ready pace,

neck in neck,

down to the wire we go.

It's by a nose.

A winner?

I loose.... once again

I do not fraught at such a task,

better lucky than good any day!

To not win.

I ponder nothing in this turn,

a rival is gained.

A site upon what could change.

Look upon my Sunrise, not my Sunset.

You are a Founding Sire.

A friend found, a target sought,

no loss in a photo finish.

I gain the sight of so much more

by proposing a HALT, not charge.

An Equine term to salivate

for a clever is a bit.

My poll is soft, I foam.

Could the stance of a rider be such?

To mount a horse astride myself,

not for the faint of heart.

For that is not a Lady's call;
Side Saddle is what I do recall.

Sexual thought bounds this tact,

the bending of the novel approach.

I dare not!

Please, re-coach!!

The stars I see in wonder-dust

 I plea to the dream of never.

I enter the room: Ride me.

Kindly I listen to hear.

I Implore for more?
A term to serve,
a prospective job to look forward too.
I yearn for tomorrow and yet I am still in this day.

The Mire Of The Lonely One

The isolation of one's needs

requires little when alone.

There in lies the death of so,

inquiry's were few.

Solitude doth desire,

no person to be told.

Where does this person now exist,

if All were in the "Know."

The Arch of such demonic toll,

'rounds the World today.

The slavery of many warn;

"do not go this way."

Not One will listen,

but, Two will go,

drug out in Chains and broken links:

To past mistakes; don't blink!!!

The changes to the clock presents

your guilt to know such guise.

Do snuffs exist? Or do you lie?

Each time you print your list.

A count of three,

it takes from thee,

leaving you............. thrice?

A cycle of: Entice.

If you do, then I'll be "knew."

The dollars will be nice.

To think upon what will be lost,

is simply; "Roll the dice"

A win declared for most is paired

with what happens to the solo, torn.

Who will care? The devious impaired!

By nothing that's not a vice.

Trapping what will cry so loud

be heard, exampling too.

Not for Me, I did get through

the screaming and the reap.

The tripping of my simple mind,

blew away and loosened the bind

upon my being of Truth.

For sake of the hidden booth.

A Title To Pain

As I sink into this divide,

the darkness of the pitch on this night's display.

The mystery of what may seem sleek:

to shun the difference between.

Left & Right

is to know death from life.

Cover your eyes before you see,

the discomfort of my soul.

It aches while not at home

in another lies the store.

Clinging not to what may be,

I cannot even tell.

What for?

The win of the Immortal!

Fighting what is not ever known.

The pain within each one,

personal and held discreetly,

I plead!!

Know the distance of your cry.

It screams the delight of only time,

ticking across this Riddler's path,

I'll never need:  I'm blind.

Scorching heat has passed along

the smear of the Midnight Hour.

As in long ago, the ghosts of low declare:

Creeping steadily in, so slow, I tow.

The deepening of the blue sea

likens itself to me.

Kindly, I respect its wonder,

illusion and the grandeur.

To ripen in the years it takes

to comfort an Old Soul.

He glances upon the she.

Bringing title's to all of Thee.

The Truth or "The Consequences" of War?



As we plod along, I ponder my existence upon Mother Earth.  Appreciative of my ability to still breath, I can slow my pace to a steady crawl across the floor.  Exhaustion fills my being and yet like a Machine, I continue.  The ready pace of any pulse beating rock song, shocks my heart into pumping out the beat so that my life begins again.

The beat of a brand new Hymn.

Musically challenged, I sing to the howls of the Moon.  Looking only for the Mate of my Calling and finding that he too is held in the brief instance that the chill of reality seems to deliver to you when you blink.  Looking around, a normal, yet seldom seen reaction to extreme trauma, I wonder.  Do you ever look at the Sun and say, "Thank you for being so bright and warming me tonight?"

Amazement at the walk of Humanity into darkness and despair Halts Me!  Why are "The People" so willing to sell out anyone for their well-being?  Do they not realize that in life, Death is watching and in Death, Life is carrying on with its daily grind, called, business.

I must respect the Men and Women that have belief.  I see that type of passion in only one place on this planet.  It is the curious part of myself that raises the eyebrows of most anyone it seems.  I am prevented from doing what comes naturally to me on a daily basis.  Instead I am hammered with questions. So, once again I must move my place of residence. 

I will one day find that these simple things that I have written down will be the words that move me around to convey to you and many others that fighting for existence is not a waste of time.  For without existence you cannot learn to live.

One day I will wrap my arms around whom shall be the one that decides I'm not such a bad person.  This Man will bring the relief that I need, a partner in crime so to speak. At least that is my hope.

Believe it or Knot!!

A young child came into my home in Mill Valley and placed a picture on my Frigidaire.

It stated, "My Mom is beautiful too."  A drawing of her was under what was so written.  It was a lovely surprise to witness upon my return home.  I have written this for your Mother so she may know how much you and your Father must love her. 

 Be strong my new FRIEND, for nothing shall separate you from your boy now.

Choice is a matter of opinion!

Do you have one?

Or, has Fate taken what you only thought you had?

Conveniently, people use this as a Con to excuse their Moral behavior,

or is it the lack thereof.

When put to the test.

You have an excuse and expect a pardon.

All based upon your plea to Humanity!

Just like a Record Player skips,

on a well worn out play;

Your cry is Old and Tired.

At least plea, "A new Defense."

The most tiresome words,

are the ones you repeat with ready response.

I mean, "Why bother to speak?"

You have already judged, condemned and Hung

every Man on this Earth.

You would presume,

to know your case against Man has been heard.

But, now that it has infiltrated both races. 

Why bother to affirm.

Who is to know! Who is who?

I wouldn't know, "You all scare me!"

"Run"

But, my feet won't go.

I seem stuck,

a spectator in a Show!

You can't be Fat!

You can't be Thin!

You can't be Ugly!

You can't be Cute,

let alone Beautiful!

Who makes these final calls?

Just curious: Cause I could loose a pound or two.

I've been sick, Homeless, Heartbroken 

Maybe my body is a body that is broken or my emotions are exhausted.

I tried to give those emotions away when I was a kid,
the day I gave my Heart to my eldest sister.

But, I guess they stayed.

Back to the Body Image thing!

I would have been considered acceptable or O.K.,

a Century or two ago.

Bummer I missed my time.

However, there is a reason for everything,
or, at least that is what I've heard.

So, maybe with a little luck,
some day, some Man will think that I am acceptable again.

A Death Date to Remember, Facebook Made Personally Laid!!

When the Time Comes,
the rock supplies a read,
before the available beneath,
can fill the 6 foot creed.

Propose the said is write,
than life delivered site,
to amply provide the crowd,
a grave to show you're proud.

The future history post,
to example not a roast,
the plot of planted host,
spake of severing close.

http://www.facebook.com/funport?sk=app_285852271465234

No Answer!! Know Fall....

To the Love that I cannot feel!

Estrangement from what has become surreal,

stuck with images, like movie films,

Reeling in my Mind on a wide screen.

The Show is Free, admission seems paid.

Life ensures your seat.

Murder is afoot; Witness your Death as a youth.

Separated from myself so young.

My pick-up did not arrive!!

I stood in shock over my body; Gone!!

Confusion, Terror, Loneliness inhabits.

I stared, only to be stuck in that same accord.

So years: They do come and they do go.

No sense for you!

Best Friends take their lives in Fright.

Screaming! Life! 

Only in strife do they answer your call.

Is it Death or is comfort really only found inside of one Man?

He sings the same Lyrics that I write.

Yet, He responds not to what is being bold.

Where is the Justice in such an account?

I write, I do not possess a Soul.

I write of what is strange,

Death Court, Sin Boards, Godless Words!

A quote of nothing, more that what may be played.

I am of the Dark, a dimly lite path.

A fight for Life,

to only tell a story of past fights.

Old Wins, We all Die!

In what you will find is called "The Continue."

That is where you will see,

I am true in my account.

Of Death! Of Life! Mostly of you,

James Blunt

You sing of what will be, its true;

I swear, He seems of my kind.

He states that we have only one other person on this Earth;

I have heard his plea.

A Twin Soul, A Twin Flame,

without this, then Soul Mates will die!

Whats the point?

If it leads to only practice of what will never be?

In the end, you will see like me.

Screaming for your matched Mate,

your Identical Flame!

As it begins to twinkle and then the light begins to be blown out,

you will feel as I do.

In painful disregard for all you have ever been.

For it is in your Last Life that you will attempt to Unite.

All so that you may have the chance to meet and ascend as One.

I am in such a Plight.

I am young and to be left so alone is killing me.

The very sight of what could be; He!

The pain is overwhelming.

Please Death, come take what cannot be; Me!

I trip, and, I fall, just to Hear my Children; To no Avail!

All that I know,

this is to much for what this Life is meant for,

I have not Volunteered to live a life of never being heard, loved or cared for.

Leave this Girl out of your lives,

of Negativity and Doubt.

For I wish to never see what you all seem to know.

Life goes on and doesn't stop when you are Dead.

Should James Blunt believe,

then without Measure and without reason: RESPOND.

or in the end,

His LIFE will be filled with the same as mine.

Loneliness and Hell

Shield Knot the Cry of Stealth!! It is where you find your Wealth.

I caution the Wind that blows Iniquities.

In such a breeze you will find me.

I deal with the Ones that you Run From!!

For in this I find "Love" and Peace of a Dove.

My way of understanding such Evil delights,

comes from years of Loneliness and Searching.

In the end, to only find dread,

it is disturbing to Fright.

What became of Opinions?

Can they only be seen in the chill of the Night?

Or, in the instant of "Might?"

No one Person seems to stand,

but all seem to Fall.

The Well is so very deep, 

where conversations seep.

What is Death?

What is Real?

Are you what I Deal?

Out in Force, of Midnight coarse,

come Demons to inspect such a hidden source.

People seem to curse and run, a divorce?

A Board! A Sin!

Ride high my Friend!

A Spirit watches from within.

Not far from here, you will know what is Queer.

Don't call for help, you may smear.

The real definitions are so very near.

Satan himself stands to confront this stunt.

What have you done to buy such a Front?

Centuries of Bondage? Millennia of Lies?

Which is it?  I don't Cry.

Look at what is forced.

Not just here, but Worldwide.

Should you choose a different way,

you are laughed at every day.

Wouldn't it be so very funny,

if "The Force" supported Honey!

For out He is, and, Shout He does.

Started with a search of what was.

Just off War;  The Sight of Death!!

The Darkness enhanced such weakness,

within Himself: He doth Wept.

Sang a song to make it along.

Should you listen, should you hear,

the words don't glisten, they are clear.

The Pain pours through what is Mused;

A Sage is loosed.

For He himself must feel used.

Left behind the charcoaled remains

of what were people, who knew the rain.

Thoughts of Death!

For it did move through,

Orphaned Kids and blackened you.

WAR!!!

It was sobering for: Phew!

On this Man, He marches, to all of you.

Jokes are many, "Twin Souls" are few, Relief is new!!

It is an offer I make to you.

Forget your roots and surely rue,

the day you Rocked and I saw you.

Sing to Emptiness. Sing to Pain.

To forget your thoughts,

is to remember you're Sane!

I've seen your pictures and videos too.

You post out there, some one sees you.

Not of anything you knew from there.

So, walk away or drive your Tank,

for obviously, all you've done is dunk.

To hide your loss, cover your hurt,

if that's the case, then change your Verse!!

For in your Words, I feel their Pain!

In your tunes, I seek what must only be in Vain.

Relief from hurt that distance will not deliver,

is a sign of your feelings: Don't Deplore, there's more.

To belittle a girl with shirts or lines of Attire,

I exhaust this mire.

I would embarrass at such a require.

How lost you must be from what you did claim.

In short time you've designed not a Raft, but Unkind.

Kids are still Orphans.

Death will still sting,

Countries don't heal by what you won't sing.

So, have an Affair with yourself,

I call fair.

No Name to Declare,

for it's in the Stars I will feel such despair.

Until such a time that I am called,

I free myself from what has made Himself small.

With Sexual Pleasure announced without Measure,

a Drunkard discard for what must have been hard.

All I have to say,

"Is simply regard."

A Fire burns Blue, when desire is True!

Are you prepared for your plight?

One that will issue your "Might?"

A darkened path of what may be,

will be the only way for you to see.

The  fright brought on by coldness,

will blacken the good hearts of Men.

To find strangeness in deliverance,

will cause Religions to bend.

Where in this discovery will be your "Win?"

Not a place where force is the begin.

Do you turn from what may cause fear?

Or, do you embrace the new things this Year?

Although different, but rather Old,

at least the Verse that seems untold.

Due are the one's that blare the blame.

For I believe that relief should be our gain.

A Twin Soul doth file her claim.

A last life known for me.

Fortunate to know his Fame,

His Voice, His Looks, His Flame!!

To turn from what is felt,

would be a crime to being dealt.

A hand of Life, that was unkind.

But, the finish I make will be a sign.

Shout, I do!  Speak, I must!

For out amongst you very beings,

walks the Twin of only Me.

I celebrate the search of He!

To not persist in what I missed,

would be so foolish, I must trust.

For I know that deep within,

inside my core there is no sin.

It is a Win!

From this Earth to the shores of "See."

This journey will be what lasts for me.

To come so far,  to really know.

Is simple Liberty for this show.

I count you so if others meet,

it is the curiosity, it seems to liven me.

Can't wait to read an other's plea,

enlightenment of what might or could actually be.

Are you harnessed by the opinion of All?

Or, does the Freedom to Know,

stretch your mind, so you won't fall?

I wonder, is that our Call?